hung beneath the lurid glare of ruined dreams raw conceit dressed in flesh and human heat
another broken clock well cleaned
a future of self prescribed irrelevance the color of debt and subjugation
hard time
a bottomless well of wishes unfulfilled a semi-erect, neglected pawn living in guilt, regret and negligence dying face down on a soiled mattress same four grey walls spinning
do we seem miserable? how should we feel? when their fat hands keep reaching out to take what’s ours they want us to like it our black hole settle in and get sucked down celebrate our decline with closed eyes
suspicion and fear decide our moral code while faith in ourselves flickers out assuming the worst is always preferable to giving the benefit of doubt the devil we know, the devil in our hearts the lover we hide from all our friends the secret we keep until our dying hour the terminal hope that we refuse to let go of... that there is more beyond death there is love
but the pain just gets worse as you age you’d better get used to its claim on your dwindling remainder of days
you’ll put a face to the name of the phantom that drove you insane she waits patiently to take you away
but every once in a while the list of mistakes you’ve compiled seems irrelevant and slips from your mind
and in those moments the weight holding you down fades away and with the pressure removed you can
almost see who you thought you would be far removed from the body and mind you reluctantly still occupy