First you take our worst song yet Then you dress Zayn up as a chick You two can play gross execs I think I should look more Jewish This video’s starting to suck dick But how can we make it total shit? We are trying to make the worst vid ever That is why Harry is dressed up like a nerd What about Liam though? He needs a character How about a homo choreographer? And I can go oh oh oh And dance like a stereotypical gay Now let’s break stuff! Nothing in this video Has to do with what we’re singing Because it’s a cheap promo It’s an advertisement For our horrible new movie Come on guys we need to make this worse Ok but let me kiss Niall first Now let’s all prance down a hallway together Trash this place for no reason whatsoever I’ll pee on this girl’s desk I’ll throw her computer What the hell is wrong with you crazy crackers? Now I’m in a shopping cart Did you know I play guitar? Nobody cares Flip the table! This video is officially shitty now But the one thing that we are still missing is a dance No no no! Yeah yeah yeah! Please don’t dance! Now we all are doing the worst dance ever It’s so bad it’s giving that man a seizure Holy crap guys look at that What are those strange creatures? We are aliens who made the planet Earth The human race was a big experiment And we’re sad to say this video’s proven It was a big mistake so we now must end it Congrats on fucking your entire planet Hold on please no no no We’ll stop the video It is too late Oh shit we’re screwed!