The credits roll, the camera pans And in the mist our hero stands He starts to speak, then folds his hands in prayer An awkward pause, then what's my line? There's nothing left to say this time And what would you say to a bad guy who's not there? In terms of Roman numerals, He's Ivy League with Roman Polanski He'd win an Oscar every time if he was only given the chance, he...
...started on the Broadway stage A product of another age, An offer and a pilot drew him west The series bombed, commercials came And though nobody knew his name They all recognized the potential he possessed Deodorants and dental floss And how much does that new car cost His acting was methodical in You Don't Need A Medical He's branded like a racing car, He's like a movie star without movies The week of Independence Day, The casting agent called to say Your smile could save our movie and the world
Buy buy buy buy Sell sell sell How well you learn To not discern Who's foe and who is friend We'll own them all in the end
It goes like this, we have no choice; the minarets, The wailing voice And vaguely Celtic music fills the air We choose a foreigner to hate, The new Iraq gets more irate We really know nothing about them, and no one cares Aladdin and the forty thieves Enhanced by brand new special effects Saddam and his cow disease spiced up With some gratuitous sex A movie's made, a war is won A low-speed chase, a smoking gun Distracts us while the actor takes the stand
Buy buy buy buy Sell sell sell How well you learn To not discern Who's foe and who is friend We'll own them all in the end