Barrett Wilbert Weed - I Could be Jewish for You | Текст песни

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• Barrett Wilbert Weed
• I Could be Jewish for You

I should have known when I met you
By the Orthodox synagogue
I should have known when I saw you
Buying extra lox at the bagel shop
I should have known
You’re not to blame
I should have seen
We’re not the same
Doesn’t take an Einstein
You’ve got the nose
You’ve got the name
The name is Steinstein
I’m not sure what you want me to do
But I think this worth working through
And I know it’s a little bit out of the blue
But I might as well try
I think I could be Jewish for you
Like on holidays
I’ll stop baking gingerbread
Start baking challah
When Hanukkah comes
I can light the mandala
Menorah
Excuse me
If you could just choose me
I’ll sing eidel deidel not fa la
Yeah, as far as the culture
I might need a clue
But I’ll give it a shot
Cuz I’ve got to be Jewish for you
I’ll go with you to Temple
I’ll try to learn Yiddish
I’ll start eating kosher
I’ll even play Quidditch
No, that’s not a Jew thing
Well, show me some new things
I won’t be the slightest bit skittish
I’ll do it by rote
Till it feels like it’s true
And till I’m ver clempt
I’ll attempt to be Jewish for you
I would be Irish or Russian or French or—
No, Chinese is a bit of a stretch
Just wait even your rabbi will
Call me a mensch
Did I mention I’ve been practicing my kvetch
Oh, I will adapt where the average girl freezes
Cuz if I have to have the “just friends” talk
I’ll do it with Jesus
Sorry, Jesus
You’re just not my type
Whatever they are
I could learn to like latkes
And if we have sons
Then they’ll all have bar matzvahs
Bar mitzvahs I’m joking
I promise I know things
Enough not to ruin chbotkas
If that’s what it takes
Then that’s what I’ll do
Please don’t run away
And one day I’ll be Jewish for you
Tell me you’ve never questioned one holy command
Tell me don’t you think love’s more romantic unplanned
Just tell me you’re nervous
We’ll start with a service
Just tell me where you stand
Tell me I need you
Tell me in Hebrew
Teach me l’chaim and horcrux and oi
Just tell me why
Instead of hi
I’ll say shalom
Till my hovel feels like home
But I won’t say goodbye
So here’s what I propose
I’ll read through the Torah from cover to cover
Till even Moses can see we were meant for each other
You know I adore you
So let me fight for you
Together we’ll take on your mother
It might be a prayer but
A prayer can come true
I dare you to dare me
I swear I’ll come through
When I’m with you there isn’t
A thing I can’t do
So if you’re inclined
I won’t mind being
Jewish for you

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