i still awake in dream when my father punches my mom in face and says "i am sorry" to me i still awake in nightmare when i saw my first haze thinking is it scourge or blessing how can't you feel the emptiness inside me and suspect there is something hidden in it since 14 years i rest in nebula for days my cloudy mind is filling with suicidal thoughts while we kissing felling physical tired of dreaming weed is splashing in my body i am sinking taking new pills giving up thinking i am the lord of haze