Satan gave me a taco And it made me really sick The chicken was all raw And the grease was mighty thick The rice was all rancid And the beans were so hard I was getting kinda dizzy Eatin’ all the lard There was aphids on the lettuce And I ate every one And after I was done The salsa melted off my tongue Pieces of tortilla Got stuck in my throat And the stains on my clothes Burned a hole through my coat My stomach was a’tremblin’ And I broke out in a rash I was so dry and thirsty And I didn’t have no cash So I went and found a hose Tore off all my clothes Turned on the water And it shot right up my nose Some old lady came along And she thought I was a freak So she beat me with her handbag ’til I could hardly speak I was lying there naked My body badly bruised In a pool of my own blood Unconscious and confused Well the cops came and got me And threw me in their van And I woke up on the ceiling And I couldn’t find my hand They took me to the judge His eyes a’glowin’ red The courtroom was filled With witches and the dead Well the sheriff was a hell-hound With fangs and claws The prisoners were tied up And chained to the walls The air was getting thick The smoke was getting thicker The judge read the verdict Said "cut off his head!" Well they placed me on the altar And they raised up the axe My head was about to explode When I noticed the marshall stacks I noticed all the smoke machines Cameras and the lights Some guy with a microphone Runnin’ around dancin’ in tights And I noticed the crew And the band playin’ down below And I realized I was in a rock video So I went and joined the band And I went out on tour And I smoked a lot of heroin And I passed out in manure I made out with the groupies (aw yeah) Started fires backstage (aw yeah, start ’em up) Made a lot of money (aw yeah, I’m makin it) And I gave it all away (give it all to me) Well the band got killed (aw, bunch of losers) So I started a solo career (aw haw, yeah And I won all the awards (get ’em all now) And I drank all the beer (drink it all up; get funky) And I opened up the taco stand (aw haw, etc.) Just to smell the smell Cookin’ with the devil Fryin’ down in hell