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Hi there! Lori here, welcoming you to another edition of Real English Conversations at Better at English dot com. Thanks to everyone who’s answered my question about the vocabulary notes in Better at English transcripts. Your answer is an overwhelming “Yes, we need the vocabulary notes.” So to help you learn English, as time permits I will continue to post transcripts and vocabulary notes for all Better at English podcasts. However, there is something you can do to help: if you are feeling generous, you could always support my work by making a donation. Just click the DONATE button on the website, www.betteratenglish.com, to learn about how you can help.

Warning: some of you might find today’s conversation topic somewhat offensive, because Michael and I talk about a rather vulgar and disturbing video that we saw on the Internet, and a related story on the BBC website. It’s about people doing amazingly stupid things to their own bodies, and involves talking about a body part that is considered rather vulgar. So if you are sensitive or easily offended, you should not listen to this conversation. For those of you who are not easily offended, there are links to the video and the BBC article on the website. And as always, the full conversation transcript and accompanying vocabulary notes are also available on the website.

So hey ho, let’s go!
Conversation transcript

Lori: Do you remember a while back there was this horrible video going around, you know one of these, umm, video links that friends pass around in email forwards?

Michael: Mmm hmm

L: And the video was of…I think it was a teenage guy who took a rocket…

M: a firework

L: a firework rocket, and put it in a very, very sensitive area and actually lit it, and you could just see him running around and screaming and, and the flame and…do you remember that?

M: That, I have, umm, the image of that is burned in my memory, no pun intended.

[link to video: warning, it is rude and vulgar watch at your own risk]

L: Yeah, and it makes you, you know, the whole Darwin Awards thing, like, so that?

M: That was actually…Interestingly enough it was Bonfire Night, November the fifth, as we call…Bonfire Night in England just recently, and I saw on the BBC a news report that somebody had done something similar just recently. I mean this is, what, you know…ten or eleven days ago… that someone had done the same thing with a firework, a rocket, and, uhhh, inserted it into, uhhh…

L: An area that doesn’t normally see the sun.

M: Yes! That’s a good way of putting it. But the difference here… and I remember the video that you mentioned, I remember seeing that, where the rocket as it was, the firework was facing outwards.

L: Uh huh.

M: Okay? This guy had put the rocket facing inwards.

L: Oooooh!

M; I think the idea was…yeah the idea was…

L: To shoot it?

M: Well, I think he wanted to make it look like “Hey, look I’ve got, ummm, I’m a rocket-powered guy!?? You know…

L: Oh dear!

M: …it was propelling him forwards, but unfortunately it didn’t quite work out and the rocket propelled itself into him.

L: Okay so he wanted to make it look like he was shooting flames out of his nether regions…

M: That’s right, that’s right but…

L: And it actually went inside and…

M: It went inside him, yeah.

L: Oh my gosh!

M: And this, I mean, this was on the national news in England, I mean how embarrassing would that be?

L: Oh yeah, did they have his name?

M: Ummm…

L: Can you imagine applying for a job after something like that, if your name had been…? And, umm, ‘cause that’s the kind of thing people will pass around as well, “Oh look at the stupid thing THIS guy did!??

M: Well I’m never going to forget that, that’s

L: Yeah that’s horrifying. I mean even the first one was horrible, I mean…how, why do people do such stupid things?

M: That was the…yeah…The thing that really struck me is “What were they thinking???

L: Yeah, what were they thinking? And how can you even get past the age of… three… and not understand that sticking a firecracker or rocket, you know, up your…

M: Up your bum.

L: Yeah! That’s just not a good idea! How does this happen?

M: Well, I don’t know I think, ummm, I mean, it’s okay in cartoons!

L: Is that it? That they can’t, that they really just don’t have a concept of, “Wow, these are flames and, and, you know, flames can burn you, and this is a sensitive area, and even a tiny, tiny little flame would just really not be very nice to have…???

M: Well, when you were, when you were young, at sch- I mean at school, ummm didn’t you ever have, ummm, things like the fire brigade come and tell you about these things? Because…

L: Oh yeah, yeah, the firefighters would come.

M: Because we have, ummm, Bonfire Night every year, traditional for letting off fireworks November the fifth… Just a few days before, the fire brigade for the different local fire brigades would go around to all the schools in Britain and you would have a lecture and they would show a video or slides, a slideshow, showing you the dangers of fireworks. And they would really hit it home. I mean we were told year after year after year that you…all these ground rules…and I can still remember them now. I mean, that you never hold a firework, you know, when you light… you don’t…If you light a firework and it doesn’t go off, you don’t go back to it.

L: Oh right, yeah.

M: You know, you leave it, because, just because you can’t see the flame burning on the blue touchpaper doesn’t mean it’s not going to go off.

L: Right

M: You never carry fireworks in your pocket. You never throw fireworks.

L: Right

M: This stuff, you know, they couldn’t have been stricter about it. I guess they still do that now; they must do that now.

L: Mmm

M: But maybe people just think they’re invincible.

L: Yeah, I guess so, because that to me is just so obvious that that’s just not a good idea.

M: Sure, I mean, the guy in the video actually pulled his pants down, and…

L: Yeah I remember.

M: Terrible.

L: That was, it was so horrifying to watch, I remember…

M: Yeah yeah

L: …just thinking, “Oh my god,?? and “What happened to the poor guy??? And at the same time it serves him right, you know, for being such an idiot.

M: I still can’t believe he actually did it.

L: I know, me neither!

Final words
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Links
Stupid bum rocket video (view at your own risk, it’s vulgar and disgusting)

BBC article about a stupid idiot and what he did with a rocket on Guy Fawkes night

See the Darwin Awards website for a compendium of human idiocy.

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