I met him in a crowded room Where people go to drink away their gloom He sat me down and so began The story of a charmless man Educated the expensive way He knows his claret from a beaujolais I think he'd like to have been Ronnie Kray But then nature didn't make him that way
He thinks his educated airs those family shares Will protect him, that you will respect him He moves in circles of friends who just pretend that they like him He does the same to them and when you put it all together There's the model of a charmless man
He knows the swingers and their cavalry Says he can get in anywhere for free I began to go a little cross eyed And from this charmless man I just had to hide
He talks at speed he gets nose bleeds He doesn't see his days are tumbling down upon him Yet he tries so hard to please he's just so keen for you to listen But no-one is listening and when you put it all together There's the model of a charmless man
He thinks his educated airs, those family shares Will protect him, that you will respect him Yet he tries so hard to please he's just so keen for you to listen But no-one is listening and when you put it all together There's the model of a charmless man