Well, I’m stranded in the city that never sleeps Some of these women they just give me the creeps I’m avoidin’ the Southside the best I can These memories I got, they can strangle a man
Well I came ashore in the dead of the night Lot of things can get in the way when you’re tryin’ to do what’s right You don’t understand it—my feelings for you You’d be honest with me if only you knew
I’m not sorry for nothin’ I’ve done I’m glad I fought—I only wish we’d won The Siamese twins are comin’ to town People can’t wait—they’re gathered around
When I left my home the sky split open wide I never wanted to go back there—I’d rather have died You don’t understand it—my feelings for you You’d be honest with me if only you knew
My woman got a face like a teddy bear She’s tossin’ a baseball bat in the air The meat is so tough you can’t cut it with a sword I’m crashin’ my car, trunk first into the boards
You say my eyes are pretty and my smile is nice Well, I’ll sell it to ya at a reduced price You don’t understand it—my feelings for you You’d be honest with me, if only you knew
Some things are too terrible to be true I won’t come here no more if it bothers you The Southern Pacific leaving me at nine forty-five I’m having a hard time believin’ some people were ever alive
I’m stark naked, but I don’t care I’m going off into the woods, I’m huntin’ bare You don’t understand it—my feelings for you Well, you’d be honest with me if only you knew
I’m here to create the new imperial empire I’m going to do whatever circumstances require I care so much for you—didn’t think that I could I can’t tell my heart that you’re no good
Well, my parents they warned me not to waste my years And I still got their advice oozing out of my ears You don’t understand it—my feelings for you Well, you’d be honest with me if only you knew