cabin pressure 01/02 - Abu DDhabi | Текст песни

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• cabin pressure 01/02
• Abu DDhabi

DOUGLAS: Greetings, oh, Sir.
MARTIN: Don't call me Sir, Douglas.
DOUGLAS: Sir's mind is fickle and changeable. I shall endeavor to remember, Sir, but from time to time, my natural awe at the majestic figure cut by Sir may bubble up, uncontrollably here. And..
MARTIN: Thank you, Douglas. Truly you're an hilarious pilot. Where's Carolyn?
DOUGLAS: Sharpening her teeth.
ARTHUR: Brushing.
DOUGLAS: Brushing her teeth. Yes, sorry. Well, in you get then, Sir of Sirs. You are letting the cold in.
MARTIN: I can't. You are in my seat.
DOUGLAS: Your seat? You have a seat?
MARTIN: Yes.
DOUGLAS: In Carolyn's car?
MARTIN: The front seat is my seat.
DOUGLAS: What? Did you call shot gun?
MARTIN: Didn't need to call a shot gun. Im the Captain.
DOUGLAS: The Captain gets the front seat in the aircraft, Martin, because he's driving it, not in any vehicle he happens to be in.
MARTIN: I always sit in the front seat in a taxi.
DOUGLAS: Only because the taxi goes to your house first. This time I got here first and so here I am, voila.
ARTHUR: Tell you what, if it makes it easier, I can go in the front.
DOUGLAS & MARTIN: Shut up, Arthur.
ARTHUR: Right.
MARTIN: Douglas, I've got to do the briefing. How am I supposed to give the briefing from the back seat?
DOUGLAS: I'll still be able to hear you. I'll be in the same car, and everything. And, my legs are longer, yards longer.
MARTIN: But, I don't..
DOUGLAS: Oh, all right, I'll toss you for it.
MARTIN: Hey, no, that's not fair. You know about me and coin tosses.
DOUGLAS: Heads or tails?
MARTIN: Oh, bloody hell, tails then.
DOUGLAS: (toss a coin) Oh, that's odd.
MARTIN: Did I win?
DOUGLAS: (Sighs) Uh..
MARTIN: Did I actually win? That never happens. That's the first time in a run of about five hundred.
DOUGLAS: Oh, just get on with it.
MARTIN: (changes the seat and enjoys) Oh, now, that is nice. Comfy. Ah..Now, listen up, chaps, here is the briefing, fairly straightforward. Weather is good . Clear skies expected in Abu Dhabi. Our alternate is Dubai. I'll operate out. Douglas, you'll operate back. Trust that's all clear?
DOUGLAS: Aye, aye, Captain Ahab.
MARTIN: I Suppose he's a friend of Captain bligh's, is he?
DOUGLAS: The three of you should go for a drink sometime.

(Carolyn comes and enters the car.)
CAROLYN: Ok, team useless. We're late.
MARTIN: But, that' because you were..
CAROLYN: Shut up and listen, here's your briefing. Douglas will operate out, Martin back. Clear skies at Abu Dhabi. Your alternate is Bahrain.
MARTIN: Carolyn, I've already done..
CAROLYN: No, really, shut up and listen. Alternate Bahrain, but of course you don’t need an alternate. Because today is the day we try running MJN as a profitable business, rather than a charitable sanctuary for rubbish pilots. Oh, no, wait, wait, wait a minute. Martin, swap seats with Douglas.
MARTIN: What?
CAROLYN: He's too tall. I can't see out of the back window. Now, come on, chop, chop!
MARTIN: I don't believe..
CAROLYN: I'm going to count to one..One!
(The two swap the seats)

DOUGLAS: Look at all this lot, carpets, vases and a storage heater.
MARTIN: Why would he want a storage heater in Abu Dhabi?
DOUGLAS: Well, there is a lot of heat to store
MARTIN: Right, we're done. Arthur, we're done.
ARTHUR: Coming, Skipper (outside the door).
MARTIN: What are you doing back there?
ARTHUR: Trying to soothe the cat. (sound of cat miaowing, screaming and biting) Ah..
MARTIN: God! What happened?
ARTHUR: I..failed.
DOUGLAS: Good heavens, are you all right?
ARTHUR: I think so. He's sweet, really. He was just playing.
MARTIN: At what, being a leopard?
DOUGLAS: I wouldn't have thought he could get his paws through the bars?
ARTHUR: Nor did I. He really can, though.
MARTIN: Do you want to go and sew yourself back together?
A

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