We're cruel and vicious pirate men As hard and tough as brass By far the fearsomest buccaneers To ever walk on grass We pillage here and plunder there We rage from dusk till dawn We hoist the anchor and swab the deck Then gather for drinks on the lawn We're the lords of the sea (Except, we aren't at sea) We're the lords of the sea (Just, not of the actual sea) Arrgh! Now woe betide ye scurvy knaves Who end up in our way We'll challenge you to a round of golf Or possibly crochet And if you dare to do us wrong You'll walk the plank no doubt Down you'll go to an awful fate Those grass stains will never come out We're the lords of the sea (With quotes around the word "sea") We're the lords of the sea (Except for the part with the sea) Arrgh! Now how we ended up here 'Tis a dire and dreadful tale Of the kind to leave the meanest rogue A-pukin' o'er the rail So faithful soul, what cursed Such a stroke of evil luck Our ship washed up on that there hill And hey, I guess it stuck SO now we hold the river here By brutal violent force We've also taken up gardening Sustainably of course We'll make you pay to cross this way And squeeze you till it hurts And on the side we sell a line Of homemade organic desserts We're the lords of the sea (Well, technically next to the sea) We're the lords of the sea Or sort of... OF THE SEA! Arrgh!