i can feel the walls closing in and i don’t want to talk anymore wish i could quietly slip away and leave you here with no void the only reason i stay is to care for you everything else in me has atrophied and i am cold and painless now i want to live but i feel nothing when can i die, when can i go when will i be free, when will i know when can i run – my legs are bound when can i go, when can i go was born a blackened seed in the wild and i never was a child i was pulled right out of the sea and the salt – it never left my body someone opened me up while i was sleeping and filled my body right up with sand i carry a heaviness like a mountain it forces me to remain alive and ugly, alive and ugly alive and ugly, alive and ugly when can i die, when can i go when will i be free, when will i know when can i run, my legs are bound can i leave here, knowing you’ll be strong without me they’ll clap when you die they’ll love you when you’re dead and they’ll understand and you’ll be forgiven then