If all your fancy diet plans have got your head a'swimmin' And everything you eat must be approved by Richard Simmons Stopped eatin' that birdseed, friend, cause what you really need Is a procedure guaranteed not to impede your need to feed
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If you've abandoned exercise and your gut keeps getting vaster Your thighs are growing over-size and your butt's gone off to pasture If you want a new demeanor and you're keen on getting leaner Then your remedy is an M.D. with a fancy vacuum cleaner
Liposuction! Liposuction! The new immediate weight reduction plan Take the fat cells from your hips, put 'em in Barbera Hershey's lips At your friendly neighborhood liposuction man
If your waist line is a'surgin' And in need of some reversion And your overall weight dispersion's Gettin' on the verge of perversion I'm encouraging an excursion To go searchin' for a surgeon And get your emergency purgin' of the burgeonin' fat emergin' from your chin! (Now Breathe!)
Liposuction! Liposuction! The new immediate weight reduction plan Get your torso reformatted, get a nose job while you're at it At your friendly neighborhood liposuction man Make your ass twelve inches thinner and be home in time for dinner At your friendly neighborhood liposuction man
Well the doctor's bill may vex ya But it sure beats anorexia