You really like gorillas? We've got just the pet for you It's the way you're forced to act To survive our schools
Make your whole life revolve around sports Walk tough--don't act too smart Be a mean machine Then we'll let you get ahead
Jock-O-Rama--Save my soul We're under the thumb of the Beef Patrol The future of America is in their hands Watch it roll over Niagara Falls
Pep rally in the holy temple And you're forced to go Masturbate en masse With the favored religious cult
Cheerleaders yell--Ra Ra Team From the locker room parades the prime beef When archaeologists dig this up They'll either laugh or cry
Jock-O-Rama--On the brain Redneck-a-thon driving me insane The future of America is in their hands Watch it roll over Niagara Falls
Unzip that old-time religion On the almighty football field Beerbellies of all ages Come to watch the gladiators bleed
"Now boys, this game ain't played for fun You're going out there to win How d'ya win? Get out there And snap the other guy's knee!"
Beat 'em up! Beat 'em up! Ra Ra Ra Snap those spinal cords Ha Ha Ha
The star quarterback lies injured Unconscious on the football field Looks like his neck's been broken Seems to happen somewhere every year
His mom and dad clutch themselves and cry Their favorite son will never walk again Coach says, "That boy gave a hundred percent What spirit What a man"
But who cares? Games over--Let's go get wasted man To the 7-11, to the liquor store Let's party all night and party some more
Another Trans-Am Wrapped itself around a telephone pole "I ain't drunk, officer I just fell gettin' out of my car"
Don't worry about it, son We were that way when we were young You've got all the skills To make a damn good businessman
Jock-O-Rama--that's the law Come lick the butts of the Beef Patrol If the future of America is handed to them Watch it roll over Niagara Falls