Dormancy - Grayscale | Текст песни

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• Dormancy
• Grayscale

To be in this moment right now, that's all there is, I try to look back but it doesn't even seem real, when did this experience begin? I honestly don't know. I try to make myself believe that one day it'll all come back, I'll see my past, know who I am, but as of now, I'm in this moment, this dark empty moment, save me, save me from what I've become, nothingness, forged from all that has wronged me, as though I'm but a conglomerate of apathy and incredible grief, nothing's left here.

A body moving through the motions, hardly doing that, there's no purpose at this point, just falling asleep is a job in itself, and I'm tired, tired of being tired, just tired of it all. Lying in bed I'm more awake than ever, only when trying to detach from nothing does everything come back, nonsensical, but that's life, that's all, learning to move on

Drowning in my mind
My body is frozen
I'm not sure if this is new
or if I'm just coming to notice
I'm just waiting for it to click
To feel like myself
Whoever that was
Whoever that is

It's been years since I've woken up to a new day, unable to break this grasp upon me it feels as though life is one continuous day, like staying up all night, like being up for days on end it simply keeps dragging on and on. The vibrant colors of autumn, the first snow of winter, things that once seemed so magical, so new, wondrous and exciting, they're just another thing to pass by, something to acknowledge and get on with, to pass time, to make it to night, to lay down, to waste 12 hours sleeping, to get on with life and hope for a better future.

I can't help but think there is no future, the future I keep hoping for is the same thing every day, it's one big blur and the last time I went to sleep and woke up to a new day was years back. Hope for something new, for a new perspective, for a new found joy in life, that's the only thing keeping me going, but every passing month and year being the same it's hard to tell if false hope is worth holding onto, maybe accepting that things aren't going to change is the only way to embrace what is.

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