I won't pick myself up just to hit the ground again, I'll lay on the tracks and feel the forces above me, freight trains above me, car after car will pass, it'll come to an end and I'll still be laying there, dead or alive I'll still be laying there, I'll still be laying down afraid to get up, afraid I'll die if I don't just lay down, afraid I'm already dead because I never got up, afraid of not being afraid and perplexed by the idea of having any other option, I'm going to let it all pass until I do, and in ways I have, I'm not sure where I went or where I'm going, one day I'm going to stand up and face it head on, head off, the moment I take action, the action will take me.
The last thing I'll see is a face, the face of what I had, the face of what left me, what destroyed me as it parted, what built me up only to let me down, to throw me off a cliff and let me crash, leaving me crippled just thinking of what was, what could've been and what never will be, I'm the product of my broken environment, don't follow me, don't pity me, do me a favor and find me a magical cure, find me a magical resolution or let me pass, leave while you can, I was struck, struck from a mysterious object that came flying out of the darkness, I've gone blind, I can't see the future, struck so hard I’m nearly paralyzed, almost completely unable able to move, I'm letting everything pass only because everything is what destroyed me, I won't stand up just to fall down, I won't even try, it's not worth the risk, what built me up only broke me down at the foundation, I'll never stand again, I feel I'll never be ready, I'll always be the crippled soul, a mind departed from its broken body, the broken mind wandering through life all alone, see me as you die, die inside, die slowly, know I've been there and you're in for the worst, you could end it while you still have the chance, there are no second chances, you'll live as you die, you’ll slowly fade, you won't be strong enough to finish the job, hear my fragile voice echo, see my broken body, you'll be here one day, one night you'll wish you ended it.
Not a call for help, this is a call for a miracle, a miracle that won’t happen, this is screaming at the top of my lungs with torn vocal chords that couldn’t mutter a whisper, this is me gouging my heart out and ripping it apart because I don’t know what the fuck else to do, this is me slashing myself with the broken glass from the rage shattered mirror that only showed my imperfections, this is a soulless body and a tortured soul, this is taking account for what is and what isn’t, what I was and what I’ll never be, what I could’ve been and what I can’t be, this is everything I don’t have the strength to hold onto, the things that eat me alive but I can’t manage to let go of, this is the coming of everything, this is what left me crippled, this is coming to terms with living out my days, this is me accepting things won’t get better, setting low expectations in hopes there’s a possibility they’re surpassed, all of this is the complete adjunction of the nothingness within me that I can’t let go of, this is everything I hate, the nothingness that feeds the demons residing in my mind, the demons birthed from tragedy, it seems that nothing ever came from any good or that there was never anything good to come from, there was nothing, nothing but that which left me as I am, what I never even considered and what I certainly never aspired to be, but don’t dwell on me, I’m doing more than enough of that myself, now’s your time, go on your own terms, go on your own terms, now’s the time, end it all or stand up tall, end it all or stand up tall or find a place to sit down, sit down and watch it all pass by you, see what happens, see just how fucked up it all really is, one day you’ll think you’re ready to get back up, to stand up tall, you’ll just begin to try and your muscles will give out, they’ll give out and you’ll be