Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Okay, alright, yo, yo Yo, yo, alright, I'm gonna lay the chorus first Here we go now
My mom loved Valium and lots of drugs. That's why I am like I am --'cuz I'm like her. Because my mom loved Valium and lots a' drugs. That's why I'm on what I'm on --'cuz I'm my mom.
"My mom, my mom" --I know you're probably tired of hearing the "my mom" oh-oh whoa-oh, but this is just a story of when I was just a shorty and how I became hooked on Va-al-iu-um. Valium was in everything: food that I ate, the water that I drank, fucking peas in my plate. She sprinkled just enough of it just to season my steak so everyday I had at least three stomach aches. Now tell me what kind of mother would want to see her son be grow up to be an under-a-fuckin'-chiever? My teacher didn't think I was gonna' be nothing, either: "What the fuck you stickin' gum up under the fuckin' seat for?" "Mrs. Mathers, your son has been huffing ether. Either that or the motherfucker's been puffin reefer." But all of this huffin' and puffin' wasn't what it was, either. It was neither. I was buzzin', but it wasn't what she thought. Pee in a tea cup? Bitch, you ain't my keeper. I'm sleepin'; What the fuck you keep on fuckin' with me for? Slut, you need to leave me the fuck alone; I ain't playin'. Go find you a white crayon and color a fuckin' zebra.
Wait a minute! This ain't dinner, this is paint thinner! "You ate it yesterday; I ain't hear no complaints, did I?" "Now here's a plate full of pain killers. Now just wait 'til I crush the Valium and put it in your potatoes. You little motherfucker, don't you sit there and make that retarded fuckin' face without even tastin' it!" "You'd better lick the fuckin', plate; you ain't wastin' it. Put your face in it before I throw you in the basement again! And I ain't givin' in. You're gonna' just sit there and want to fuckin' play spin again until next Thanksgiving, and if you still ain't finished it, I'll use the same shit again, and when I make spinach dip, it'll be placed in the shit! You little shit, wanna' sit there and play innocent? A rat fell and hit me in K-Mart, and they witnessed it! Child support? Your father, he ain't sent the shit! So what if he did? It's none of your dang business, kid!"
My mom, there's no one else quite like my mom. I know I should let bygones be bygones, but she's the reason why I am high on what I'm high on.
Hook
My mom loved Valium. Now, what I am is a party animal. I am what I am, but I'm strong to the finish wit' me Valium spinach. But my bars only last about two minutes! But I don't want to swallow it without chewin' it. I can't even write a rhyme without you in it, my Valium, my Val-i-um. Oh!
Man, I never thought that I could ever be a drug addict. --"nah, fuck that, I can't have it happen to me!" but that's actually what has ended up happenin' in a tragedy fuckin' passin' it up back to me. And it's probably where I got acquainted with the taste, ain't it? Pharmaceuticals are the bomb, Mom! Beautiful! She killed the fuckin' dope with the medicine she done fed it. Feed it a fuckin' aspirin and say that it has a headache. "Here, wanna' snack? You hungry, you fuckin' brat? Look at that! It's a Xanax! Take it and take a nap! Eat it!" But I don't need it! "Well fuck it, then break it up! Take a little piece and beat it before you wake Nathan up!" Alright, Ma, you win! I don't