Depression storming down on me. Anxiety is reigning king. Failures are spit back in my face. I'm letting this life pass away. These roads will lead me to my grave. These are the roads and paths I chose to pave avoidant and withdrawn I'll stay. Misanthropy the price I pay for following my dreams. Disillusion break my wings and set me free. Murphy's fucking law refers to me. Sore throat, sore lungs, bad mood bad luck, stay cold, locked up. Every door has closed. I'm disenchanted and alone spirit expired in it's host the damaging effects of loss. There is no higher price or cost than losing everything you love. I walk in limbo my lease on life, revoked. the things I passed up for this are now my ghosts ghost will haunt abandon, disappear. All you love is dying here. Can't end up like them. Damn the pessimist. I'm enthralled in the absence of innocence. Disillusionist. Embrace despair. Accept it as punishment