Ben Franklin:
I’m big Ben Franklin and this shan't be pretty
Let me instruct you how we battle in the city of Philly
You couldn’t sell Rick James a bag of crack. You’re out of practice
My victory’s more certain than death or taxes
Fact is, you’re a hack, wack QVC joke
You peddle soap that cleans bird shit from my windows
I’ll craft a lyrical coffin and then spit the nails in
Call me Arthur Miller son, cause it’s death of a salesman!
Billy Mays:
Hi, Billy Mays here with a special TV offer
Watch me crush this bald, fat, foppish founding father
I’ll take my awesome auger and sow your Quaker oats
I’ll shoot your rhymes down like a regiment of red coats
I’m the lord of the pitch and leader in home sales
You’re just a lumpy pumpkin who invented the mail
Benny’s got kite 'n key, but you’re in for a shock
When I strike you with bolts from my lightning rod cock!
Benjamin Franklin:
Stop! I protest these intolerable raps
It takes just one easy payment for me to whoop your ass!
Cause I’m mint, I’m money! I’m an educated gentleman
So join or die, Bill, cause it’s all about the Benjamin
Billy Mays:
But wait! There’s more...
(RIP BILLY MAYS: 1958 – 2009 “Lord of the Pitch”)
Announcer:
Is there anyone out there who could finish this battle? Anyone? Anyone...
Vince Offer:
I can. You following me camera guy? Cause it’s about to get furious
You’re gonna love my nuts until you’re bi-focal-curious
Your boy George chopped down trees. You couldn’t break a piece of balsa
Slap chop your face. Make a double chin salsa!
Your style is so broke, they call you Poor Richard
It’s bad enough I gotta see you every time I tip a stripper
Vince against a founding father is just too bad
Cause after this America's gonna lose a Dad!
Epic Rap Battles of History #10 еще тексты
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