The words are so familiar - All the same greats, the same mistakes It doesn't have to be like this.
If you don't make a friend, now One might make you - So learn The gentle art of making enemies
Don't you look so surprised Happy birthday...fucker Blow that candle out, We're gonna kick you
(don't say you're not because you are) (don't say you're not because you are) (history tells us that you are) (history tells us that you are)
And all you need is just one more excuse You put up one hell of a fight You put up one hell of a fight I wanna hear your very best excuse I never felt this much alive I never felt this much alive
Your day has finally come - So wear the hat and do the dance And let the suit keep wearing you.
This year you'll sit and take it And you will like it - It's the gentle art of making enemies
I deserve a reward 'Cause I'm the best fuck that you ever had And if I tighten up my hole You may never see the light again
(there's always an easy way out) (there's always an easy way out) (you need something wet in your mouth) (you need something wet in your mouth)
And all you need is just one more excuse You put up one hell of a fight You put up one hell of a fight I wanna hear your very best excuse I never felt this much alive I never felt this much alive