Hey there, people, I'm Bobby Brown They say I'm the cutest boy in town My car is fast, my teeth is shiney I tell all the girls they can kiss my heinie Here I am at a famous school I'm dressin' sharp 'n I'm Actin' cool I got a cheerleader here wants to help with my paper Let her do all the work 'n maybe later I'll rape her
Oh God I am the American dream I do not think I'm too extreme An' I'm a handsome sonofabitch I'm gonna get a good job 'n be real rich (Get a good, get a good, get a good, get a good job)
Women's Liberation Came creepin' across the nation I tell you people, I was not ready When I fucked this dyke by the name of Freddie She made a little speech then, Aw, she tried to make me say when She had my balls in a vice, but she left the dick I guess it's still hooked on, but now it shoots too quick
Oh God I am the American dream (P.U.) But now I smell like Vaseline An' I'm a miserable sonofabitch Am I a boy or a lady . . . I don't know which (I wonder wonder, wonder wonder)
So I went out 'n bought me a leisure suit I jingle my change, but I'm still kinda cute Got a job doin' radio promo An' none of the jocks can even tell I'm a homo Eventually me 'n a friend Sorta of drifted along into S&M I can take about an hour on the tower of power 'Long as I gets a little golden shower
Oh God I am the American dream With a spindle up my butt till it makes me scream An' I'll do anything to get ahead I lay awake nights sayin', "Thank you, Fred!" Oh God, Oh God, I'm so fantastic! Thanks to Freddie, I'm a sexual spastic And my name is Bobby Brown Watch me now; I'm goin' down, And my name is Bobby Brown Watch me now; I'm goin' down, And my name is Bobby Brown Watch me now; I'm goin' down
Ha-ha . . .
O'Hearn: Yeah . . . I knew you'd be surprised . . .