The past is lucidly compared. The future is too much of a burden to caress or evaluate. Drunken nights walking towards a house of noise and I count each step. With each step I draw my breath, with each step I tear up with death. With each step of my black shoes I crush the petals from the roses I gave to you. I still don’t know the notion of home. But, I made “home” on a mattress on your floor. Where I endured two last kiss and felt the difference between dirt poor and lavishly rich. Where the love of your life you let die twice, a stake to the heart with pride as the price. You kept your dreams, I kept my flowers, which I sent to a friend in a letter that said, “I just wanted to tell you that I still love and care for you; yesterday, I saw you walking.” I meet your eyes blankly, a lover and enemy of primal nature: noticing everything, remembering nothing. I tell you I want you, I’ve told you I want you. You reply, “Maybe one day. Maybe someday.”