1. Oh, Melinda, she was handsome, the fairest in the land. Her nose was like a big hoecake, and her cheeks was like a ham. She was six feet and over, her hair a beautiful red. She used to stand upon her chair when she wanted to scratch her head.
CHORUS: Oh, don't you cry, Melinder; now, don't you cry for me. I'm a-goin' away to leave you way down in Tennessee, But I'll be back again, my love, when the corn is in the ear, To pick upon my old banjo for you, Melinder, dear.
2. The first time that I met her, I never will forget. She put her arms around my neck and pressed me to her lips. She whispered very gently: \"You are a handsome chap.\" She broke my new suspenders when she set upon my lap. CHORUS
3. If I were an elephant, how happy I would be! I'd lock Melinder in my trunk and throw away the key. If I was a alligator, and went out fer a swim, I'd open up my allergate and scoot ol' 'Linder in. CHORUS TWICE