Гуру ПесенGTA IV - WKTT - Fizz1 | Текст песни
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CROWD: Fizz!
ANNOUNCER: It's time for Fizz.
JANE: It's Fizz time, everybody! The celebrity show that puts the lobotomy
back on the cultural agenda. I'm Jane Labrador, and I'm joined as ever by
Marcel Lemieux, and Jeffron James. And boy have we got a greatly stuffed show
for you today.
MARCEL: That's right. Lie on your stomach and bite your pillow, America! Let's
find out what's happening in this crazy world of unceasing celebrity banality.
JANE: Let's get down and dirty. Dragon Brain, the movie filled with more CGI,
less story, is sending America Dragon-Crazy!
JEFFRON: Now here is a movie only fat trolls from the suburbs could enjoy. A
bunch of pale, inbred religious whackos runnin' around in leather clothes and
hittin' each other with pointy sticks!
MARCEL: What are you talking about? It's fantastic! I can't wait 'til it comes
out in high-def, so you can see every tear in his tunic, as the orcs try to
mate with Lord Abstentinos-
JANE: We wanted to speak to the star of the show, Clyde Letter, but
unfortunately, his publicist says his penchant for DWI's has him very busy
pretending to console the family of the father he killed. Instead, we've
got Dragon Brain child star Christopher Kibbits, who played William of
Mammary in the film. Here's a tease.
CK: Lord Abstentinos! I've never even touched a girl's bosom (bottom?) Your
sword is enormous!
JANE: That's powerful stuff!
CK: Thanks. I really learned a lot while doing this film. I learned how to be
a selfish dolt and a materialistic prick, and my director taught me how to
roll a joint.
MARCEL: Christopher! Your life must be really exciting right now. Just
starting to figure out if you like girls or boys...
CK: Oh, it is! I've got a bunch of new Vinewood friends. And I get to wear
sunglasses indoors! Plus, I started doing coke!
JANE: What is your favorite memory from the set of Dragon Brain?
CK: Oh, it's great. Between takes, Owen McBarbine, who played the wizard,
he'd take me back to his trailer. He'd perform [???] on his trousers and made
them gross.
CROWD: Fizz!
MARCEL: He is so cute, I could just eat him up!
JEFFRON: Yeah. Eat him up! There's nothin' more appetizin' than a tween with
a drug problem and a massive ego. What a dick!
JANE: Also, we spoke with McEllen. Now you may remember McEllen from the
eighties. His European spitz rock was very popular for a while, and now he's
planning a comeback!
MARCEL: Good to see you, McEllen. I used to love your records!
MAN: But of course you did. You're a human being.
MARCEL: And now you're making a comeback!
MAN: Ya. McEllen wants to set the record straight. It is time for everyone to
accept the fact, McEllen has had enormous influence on the music world.
Before me, the records-they didn't spin!
MARCEL: Really?
MARCEL: Ya. This is true, this is true. McEllen is force of nature. I invent
the game of rock, the hippy scum...
JANE: Meanwhile, in comedy news, our reporter Susan Retriever spent this
morning getting tested for herpes! So instead we all had an incredibly
exciting conversation with top comedian Ricky Gervais, who is performing at
Split Sides to rave reviews.
JEFFRON: Hey, Ricky, I've got a serious question. How come people from
England never laugh?
GERVAIS: Because not many people go around in England just laughing cause
they enjoy it, cause they'd be mental. I mean, you see some people on the
street, walking around laughing at nothing, they also piss in their tongues,
and punch pregnant women in the face. So
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