I'm William the Conqueror My enemies stood no chance They call me the first English king Although I come from France
1066, the Domesday book I gave to history So fat, on death my body burst But enough about me
To help remember all your kings I've come up with this song A simple rhyme and ditty For you all to sing along!
Oh! William! (Bit short, init? We need more kings. Who came next?)
William second, cheeks were red Killed out hunting, so it's said I took over, Henry one That's my next eldest son
Then King Stephen, it's true, check it! Hi, Henry two, killed Thomas Beckett Richard Lionheart? That's right! Always spoiling for a fight
Oh, King John! What a disaster! Rule restrained by Magna Carta!
William, William, Henry, Stephen Henry, Richard, John, oi! Time for my mate, King Henry eight To take up this song
Henry three built the abbey Ed one hated Scots A red hot poker killed Ed two That must have hurt him lots!
Edward third was a chivalry nerd Began the hundred years war Then Richard two was king, aged ten Then Henry, yes one more!
King Henry four, plots galore Not least from Henry five, moi I killed ten score at Agincourt Then Henry six arrived!
Edward four, Edward five Richard the third, he's bad 'Cause he fought wars with Henry seventh First Tudor and my dad
So Henry eight, I was great Six wives, two were beheaded Edward the sixth came next, but he died young And so my dreaded Daughter Mary ruled, so scary Then along came... me! I'm Liz the first, I had no kids So Tudors RIP!
William, William, Henry, Stephen Henry, Richard, John, oi! Henry, Ed, Ed, Ed, Rich two Then three more Henrys join our song! Edward, Edward, Rich the third Henry, Henry, Ed again Mary one, good Queen Bess That's me! Time for more men!
James six of Scotland next Is English James the first, he led Then Stuarts ruled, so Charles the first The one who lost his head
No monarchy until came me, Charles two, I liked to party King Jimmy two was scary, oooh! Then Mary was a smarty
She ruled with Bill, their shoes were filled By sourpuss Queen Anne Gloria And so from then, you were ruled by men Till along came me, Victoria!
William, William, Henry, Stephen Henry, Richard, John, oi! Henry, Ed, Ed, Ed, Rich two Then three more Henrys join our song! Edward, Edward, Rich the third Henry, Henry, Ed again Mary one, good Queen Bess Jimmy, Charles and Charles and then Jim, Will, Mary, Anne Gloria Still to come, it's Queen Victoria!
And so began the Hanover gang George one and George two... grim! Then George the third was quite absurd Till I replaced old him
King George the fourth and known henceforth As angry, fat and cross... hang on! It's true you beat Napoleon But were mostly a dead loss... bang on!
Old William four was a sailor... ahoy! It's nearly the end of the storya As onto the scene comes the best loved queen Hail to Queen Victoria!
William, William, Henry, Stephen Henry, Richard, John, oi! Henry, Ed, Ed, Ed, Rich two Then three more Henrys join our song! Edward, Edward, Rich the third Henry, Henry, Ed again Mary one, good Queen Bess Jimmy, Charles and Charles and then Jim, Will, Mary, Anne Gloria George, George, George, George Will, Victoria! Victoria!
(I ruled for sixty four years, you know! )
Ed seven, George five Then Ed, George sixth Those two then reigned and how! And so our famous monarch song Is brought right up to now! Oh!
William, William, Henry, Stephen Henry, Richard, John, oi! Henry, Ed, Ed, Ed, Rich two Then thr