Slay bells jingle-ling ring jing jingle-ling horses, horses, horses, horses Slay bells jingle-ling ring jing jingle-ling (gunshot) Santa Claus suck my balls Drunk as hell ringing bells at the malls Dancer Prancer Nixon and Cupid I'm a get stupid, ha ha ha, eh I sat around all night under the chimney Holdin my sack like gimme gimme I know that he's commin he's commin he must Lookin up nuthin but rust, dust. Turn on my TV the very next day I see your gettin paid leaden the parade I'm that sniper on the buildin Listen to my nine go click, Santa's a fat bitch (2x) Santa Claus is a fat bitch Santa Claus is a fat bitch Another year and I aint get shit Another year I aint get shit If I hear him land on my roof Ohh my undertaker I'm a bust your ass in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth Yeah I got somethin to say about St. Nick Fuck that hoe he never brought jack shit No toys, candy canes, j just a lump of coal, So I eat it, cuz there ain't nuttin in the cupboard So I'll be quick, quick and brief All I need for Christmas is my two front teeth I got mine kicked, kicked out my mouth I need a few new ones could you help me out Should of known I'd get the short end of the stick No kinda gift, I didn't get shit. Some say I was bad, but that wasn't it. It's all because, (2x) Santa's a fat bitch Santa Claus is a fat bitch Santa fuck you cuz your a hoe Another year and I ain't got shit Another year I ain't get shit If I hear him land on my roof I'm a bust your ass in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth "Oh-ho-ho don't go that way Rudolf that's the ghetto ho-ho those boys and girls don't deserve anything" (in Background: Slay bells ringling jing jing jingle-ling horses, horses, horses, horses) Santa Claus, Santa Claus, where you been? I see you got cookies and milk on your chin I guess you had time to collect your ends You always been down for your rich friend But Rudolf, he don't bring his slay my way Nuthin but dirt and coal for little J I guess you couldn't fit down my chimney shaft You need to loose some of that fat ass, eh All the little rich boys they gettin paid Countin the toys and rockets they made. Me? I got a little half little chunk of dog shit I'm a kill that fat bitch, Santa Claus is a fat bitch He ate too much McDonalds Another year and I aint get shit Mrs. Claus is a ho If I hear him land on my roof Slice that bitch in the big red coat I'm a bust your ass in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth For the neighborhood Christmas and everything's whack Not a creature stirring but a fuckin rat I aint hearin jingle bells I aint hearin nuttin Aint smellin no turkey sure as hell aint no stuffin All that I paid Wished and prayed That fat mutha fucka would swing my way Drop off soldiers and rubber balls But I woke up and found some crusty old drawers Just as I knew it shaft again, and again, and again,and again Every year I wake up to the same old shit....house there be no sign of the fat bitch (2x) Santa Claus is a fat bitch Santa Claus is a fat bitch (2x) Another year and I aint get shit Another year I aint get shit If I hear him land on my roof If I hear him land on my roof I'm a bust your ass in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth (2x) Santa Claus is a fat bitch Santa Claus is a fat bitch Another year and I aint get shit I aint ge-et shi-it If I hear him land on my roof Ro-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoof I'm a bust your ass in the too-hoo-hoo-hoo-hooth (record scratching) "He's got a fuzzy whit beard and a great big smile, a bright red hat you can see for a mile, a bag full of goodies and a great big grin, hear comes Santa Claus again."