JACK I wish you'd give us some milk or even cheese...
BAKER & WIFE I wish we might have a child.
CINDERELLA, JACK, BAKER & WIFE I wish...
STEPMOTHER You wish to go to the Festival?
NARRATOR The poor girl's mother had died,
STEPMOTHER You, Cinderella, the Festival? You wish to go to the Festival?
FLORINDA What, you, Cinderella, the Festival? The Festival?!
LUCINDA What, you wish to go to the Festival?
ALL THREE The Festival? The King's Festival?
NARRATOR And her father had taken for his new wife
STEPMOTHER The Festival...
NARRATOR a woman with two daughters of her own.
FLORINDA Look at your nails!
LUCINDA Look at your dress!
STEPMOTHER People would laugh at you-
CINDERELLA Nevertheless, I still want to go to the Festival And dance before the Prince.
STEPMOTHER & STEPSISTERS She still wants to go to the Festival And dance before the Prince?!
NARRATOR All three were beautiful of face, but vile and black of heart. Jack, on the other hand, had no father, and his mother-
JACK'S MOTHER I wish...
NARRATOR Well, she was not quite beautiful-
JACK'S MOTHER I wish my son were not a fool. I wish my house was not a mess. I wish the cow was full of milk. I wish the house was full of gold- I wish a lot of things...
BAKER'S WIFE Why, come in, little girl.
LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD I wish...
It's not for me, It's for my Granny in the woods. A loaf of bread, please- To bring my poor old hungry Granny in the woods... Just a loaf of bread, please...
NARRATOR Cinderella's Stepmother had a surprise for her.
STEPMOTHER I have emptied a pot of lentils into the ashes for you. If you have picked them out again in two hours' time, you shall go to the ball with us.
LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD And perhaps a sticky bun?... Or four?...
CINDERELLA Birds in the sky, Birds in the eaves, I the leaves, In the fields, In the castles and ponds...
LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD And a few of those pies... please...
CINDERELLA Come, little birds, Down from the eaves And the leaves, Over fields, Out of castles and ponds...
JACK No, squeeze, pal...
CINDERELLA Ahhh... Quick, little birds, Flick through the ashes. Pick and peck, but swiftly, Sift through the ashes, Into the pot...
JACK'S MOTHER Listen well, son. Milky-White must be taken to market.
JACK But, mother, no- she's the best cow-
JACK'S MOTHER Look at her. There are bugs on her dugs. There are flies in her eyes. There's a lump on her rump Big enough to be a hump-
JACK But-
JACK'S MOTHER Son, We've no time to sit and dither, While her wither's wither with her- And no one keeps a cow for a friend! Sometimes I fear you're touched.
LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD Into the woods, It's time to go, I hate to leave, I have to, though. Into the woods- It's time, and so I must begin my journey.
Into the woods And through the trees To where I am Expected ma'am, Into the woods To Grandmother's house-
Into the woods To Grandmother's house-
BAKER'S WIFE You're certain of your way?
LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD The way is clear, The light is good, I have no fear, Nor no one should. The woods are just trees, The trees are just wood. I sort of hate to ask it, But do you have a basket?
Into the woods And down the dell, The path is straight, I know it well. Into the woods, And who can tell What's waiting on the journey?
Into the woods To bring some bread To Granny who Is sick in bed. Never can tell What lies ahead. For all that I know, She's already dead.
But into the woods, Into the woods, Into the woods To Grandmother's house And home before dark.
CINDERELLA Fly, birds, Back to the sky, Back to the eaves And the leaves And the fields And the-
FLORINDA Hurry up and do my hair, Cinderella! Are you really wearing that?
LUCINDA Here, I found a little tear, Cinderella. Can't you hide it with a hat?
CINDERELLA You look beautiful.
FLORINDA I know.
LUCINDA She means me.
FLORINDA Put it in a twist.
LUCINDA Who will be there?...
CINDERELLA Mother said be good, Father said be nice, That was always their advice. So be nice, Cinderella, Good, Cinderella, Nice good good nice-
FLORINDA Tighter!
CINDERELLA What's the good of being good If everyone is blind And you're always left behind? Never mind, Cinderella, Kind Cinderella- Nice good nice kind good nice-
FLORINDA Not that tight!
CINDERELLA Sorry.
FLORINDA Clod.
BAKER'S WIFE Who might that be?
BAKER It's the witch from next door.
NARRATOR The old enchantress told the couple she had placed a spell on their house.
BAKER What spell?
WITCH In the past, when your mother was with child, she developed an unusual appetite. She took one look at my beautiful garden
and told your father that what she wanted more than anything in the world was
Greens, greens and nothing but greens: Parsley, peppers, cabbages and celery, Asparagus and watercress and Fiddleferns and lettuce-!
He said, "All right," But it wasn't, quite, 'Cause I caught him in the autumn In my garden one night! He was robbing me, Raping me, Rooting through my rutabaga, Raiding my arugula and Ripping up my rampion (My champion! My favorite!)- I should have laid a spell on him Right there, Could have changed him into stone Or a dog or a chair...
But I let him have the rampion- I'd lots to spare. In return, however, I said, "Fair is fair: You can let me have the baby That your wife will bear. And we'll call it square."
BAKER I had a brother?
WITCH No. But you had a sister.
NARRATOR But the witch refused to tell him anymore of his sister. Not even that her name was Rapunzel.
WITCH I thought I had been more than reasonable. But how was I to know what your father had also hidden in his pocket?!
BAKER What?
WITCH Beans.
BAKER & WIFE Beans?
WITCH The special beans. I let him go, I didn't know He'd stolen my beans!
I was watching him crawl, Back over the wall-! Then bang! Crash! And the lightning flash! And- well, that's another story, Never mind- Anyway, at last The big day came, And I made my claim. "Oh, don't take away the baby," They shrieked and screeched, But I did, And I hid her Where she'll never be reached.
And your father cried, And your mother died When for extra measure- I admit it was a pleasure- I said, "Sorry, I'm still not mollified." And I laid little spell on them You, too, son- That your family tree Would always be a barren one...
So there's no more fuss And there's no more scenes And my garden thrives- You should see my nectarines! But I'm telling you the same I tell kings and queens: Don't ever never ever Mess around with my greens! Especially the beans.
JACK'S MOTHER Now closely to me, Jack. Lead Milky-White to market and fetch the best price you can. Are you listening to me?
Jack Jack Jack, Head in a sack, The house is getting colder, This is not the time for dreaming. Chimney stack Starting to crack, The mice are getting bolder, The floor's gone slack, Your mother's getting older, Your father's not back, And you can't just sit here dreaming pretty dreams.
To wish and wait From day to day Will never keep The wolves away.
So into the woods The time is now. We have to live, I don't care how. Into the woods To sell the cow, You must begin the journey. Straight to the woods and don't delay- You have to face The marketplace. Into the woods to journey's end-
JACK Into the woods to sell a friend-
NARRATOR Meanwhile, the Witch, for purposes of her own, explained how the Baker might lift the spell;
WITCH You wish to have The curse reversed? I'll need a certain Potion first. Go to the woods and bring me back One: the cow as white as milk, Two: the cape as red as blood, Three: the hair as yellow as corn, Four: the slipper as pure as gold.
Bring me these Before the chime Of midnight, In three day's time, And you shall have, I guarantee, A child as perfect As child can be. Go to the wood!
STEPMOTHER Ladies. Our carriage waits.
CINDERELLA Now may I go to the Festival?
STEPMOTHER The Festival-! Darling, those nails! Darling, those clothes! Lentils are one thing but Darling, with those, You'd make us the fools of the Festival And mortify the Prince!
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