John Finnemore - Cabin Pressure - S01 - E01- Abu Dhabi | Текст песни

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• John Finnemore
• Cabin Pressure - S01 - E01- Abu Dhabi

Abu Dhabi (S01E01)

Synopsis: The first episode of the series, it’s here that we meet Carolyn, Arthur, Martin, and Douglas. Martin struggles to assert his authority over Douglas while Carolyn struggles to keep them both from bankrupting her company, and Arthur just struggles to keep up!

Favorite quotes:

"My signature dish! Behold – surprising rice!" - Arthur
“I don’t have an airline; I have one jet. You cannot put one jet in a line. If MJN is anything, it is an airdot.” - Carolyn
“Oh dear, surely we had two wings when we started.” - Carolyn

"How long can a cat survive in an unheated hold at thirty-four thousand feet?" - Martin

"Oh, I used to know this one… It’s always coming up in pub quizzes." - Douglas

Click here to listen!

Full transcript under the cut!

[bing bong]

Douglas: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, First Officer Douglas Richardson here. Just to let you know, we are making our final approach now into what I am fairly sure is Fitton Airfield. Unless it’s a farm. Or just possibly the A45. It’s not the sea, because that’s blue. I should perhaps explain that Captain Crieff and I have a sportsman-like little bet on today about who can fly the best after drinking a liter of vodka through a straw. The Captain went first. You may have noticed the takeoff run was a little bumpy, particularly over the golf course. Now it’s me to land… just as soon as I decide which of these two runways to aim for. And I’m happy to tell you that I feel lucky! So on behalf of all your crew today, may I just say… GERONIMO!!

[credits]

Martin: Blessed.

Douglas: Ah yes, of course. May.

Martin: Mm-hmm, yep. Cant.

Arthur: Here we are, gents: coffee with nothing in it, tea with everything in it. Great cabin address, Douglas. I love cargo flights.

Douglas: Thank you, Arthur.

Martin: Ooh! Eno.

Douglas: Ooweeno?

Martin: Ooh, Eno.

Douglas: Ah yes! Sewell.

Arthur: Ooh, what are we playing?

Martin: Brians of Britain.

Arthur: There must be loads of them! Umm… uhhh…

Douglas: Well, not to worry, as they come to you…

Arthur: Oh! Who was that guy… um, oh, gray hair, did that game show, “Can I have a ‘P’ please, Bob?” Um, what was his name?

Douglas: Your hope being that it was Brian?

Arthur: Yeah! Brian… uh, Brian…

Martin: Bob Holness, it was Bob Holness.

Arthur: That’s it! Oh. Well, does he count anyway?

Douglas: Does Bob Holness count in our list of people called Brian? What the hell, yes he does. Well done.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tower: Golf tango india, expect twenty minute delay due runway inspection. Enter the hold at Arden, maintain seven thousand feet.

Martin: Golf tango india, roger, hold at Arden, maintain seven thousand feet. Can you confirm delay only twenty minutes?

Tower: *sigh* Probably. It all depends, really.

Martin: Thank you, tower. Hugely informative, as ever. Out. Sorry chaps, looks like we’d better divert to Bristol.

Arthur: Bristol? Why?

Martin: Fitton’s got a runway closure, we’d have to hold for twenty minutes.

Arthur: But Bristol, that’s miles away.

Martin: Yes, luckily enough, though, we’re in an aeroplane, specially designed to be good at going miles away quite quickly.

Arthur: Yeah, but my car’s at Fitton.

Martin: Oh, well, then, let us by all means circle ‘round it until we drop out of the sky.

Douglas: Do you know, Martin, all these years and I’ve never been to Bristol.

Martin: Well get ready for a treat.

Douglas: I don’t know, I was rather hoping not to break my duck.

Arthur: Skipper, are you sure there’s not enough fuel to wait? Cause, there’s always a little bit left when the gauge shows red.

Martin: Yes, oddly enough Arthur, a jet aircraft isn’t as