Advance the spark Put pedal to the metal The gale blows, but let's hoist all the sails. Advance the spark Tie down the governor This rocket-sled has left the rails.
Advance the spark Burn rubber on the speedway The aircraft shakes, full-throttle in the shallow dive. Advance the spark Tie down the governor And no one's coming out alive.
I should have known, once I was moving I should have known I'd get the taste I should have known I'd soon be living For the wind in my face. I should have known I'd fall in love I should have known I'd do it fast I should have known there'd be a problem You're built for speed, I'm built to last.
Advance the spark But I can't hold her, Captain Warp 9.5, the core is going to blow. Advance the spark Tie down the governor Let's see how fast this thing will go.
Advance the spark The Cresta run is waiting And Houston's Go for main stage engine start. Advance the spark And throw the stopwatch away There's nothing faster than the heart.
I should have known, once I was moving I should have known I'd get the taste I should have known I'd soon be living For that look on your face. I should have known I'd fall in love I should have known I'd do it fast I should have known there'd be a problem You're built for speed, I'm built to last.
Advance the spark Your spark comes back to meet me The petrol washes all around the floor. Advance the spark The kiss, the conflagration And nothing matters any more.
JUDGE SAYS:
A song about speed and sex (that's 'speed' as in velocity, by the way) that was inspired, in part, by the bizarre, and distinctly rude, movie 'Crash'. The lyrics feature a couple of rather archaic expressions which younger people might not have come across before: 'Advance the spark' dates from a time when petrol engines, particularly on motorbikes, had a control for adjusting the timing of the ignition. The rider could 'advance' or 'retard' the spark to get the maximum power out of the engine.
'Tie down the governor' is even more ancient, dating back to the age of steam. Steam engines were fitted with a safety-valve in the form of a revolving pair of weights driven by the engine. The spinning weights would be thrown outwards by centrifugal force, and at a certain speed would start progressively opening a valve to release the steam, thus keeping the pressure at a safe maximum. This device was called 'the governor', and it acted like a 'cruise-control'. However, if the operator wanted to get extra speed or power from the machine at the expense of safety, he could literally tie 'the governor' down, so that it wouldn't open, however high the pressure rose.
The first verse has a reference to the 1950s, American experiments with rocket-powered sleds running on rails. At the time, they were the fastest vehicles on earth.
For non-UK listeners
The third verse is full of references to 'Star Trek' (how sad is that?), but I mention this because I understand that the 'Star Trek' mythos is by no means universally known outside the English speaking world.
The Cresta run, in verse four, is a toboggan (a type of bobsleigh) course in St Moritz, Switzerland, well-known in Britain as a rite of passage for a certain type of wealthy, privileged young Englishmen. They slide down it at high speed, and bash their silly heads in with pleasing regularity.