Burlington Bertie from Bow I'm Bert, p'raps you've heard of me, Bert. You've had word of me, Jogging along, hearty and strong Living on plates of fresh air I dress up in fashion And when I am feeling depressed I shave from my cuff all the whiskers and fluff Stick my hat on and toddle up West I'm Burlington Bertie, I rise at ten thirty And saunter along like a toff I walk down the Strand with my gloves on my hand Then I walk down again with them off I'm all airs and graces, correct easy paces Without food so long I've forgot where my face is I'm Bert, Bert, I haven't a shirt But my people are well off you know. Nearly everyone knows me from Smith to Lord Rosebr'y, I'm Burlington Bertie from Bow! I'm Burlington Bertie, I rise at ten thirty And saunter along Temple Bar As round there I skip I keep shouting 'Pip Pip!' And the darn'd fools think I'm in my car At Rothchild's I swank it My body I plank it On his front door step with 'The Mail' for a blanket I'm Bert, Bert, and Rothchild was hurt He said ' You can't sleep there' I said 'Oh?' He said 'I'm Rothchild, sonny!' I said 'That's damn'd funny, I'm Burlington Bertie from Bow' I'm Burlington Bertie, I rise at ten thirty And Buckingham Palace I view. I stand in the yard while they're changing the guard And the queen shouts across "Toodle oo"! The Prince of Wales' brother along with some other Slaps me on the back and says "Come and see Mother" I'm Burlington Bert, and Royalty's hurt, When they ask me to dine I say no. I've just had a banana with Lady Diana I'm Burlington Bertie Burlington Bertie I'm Burlington Bertie! I'm Burlington Bertie from Bow!