Kollektivet - TMI (Too Much Information) | Текст песни

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• Kollektivet
• TMI (Too Much Information)

We are about to get extremely seriously together
And I know our lives are gonna get so much better
But first we should come clean and just be honest with each other
That’s what I learned from the most important person in my life, my mother
We both have secrets and things we’re not proud of, I believe it’s true
And it’s best to talk about them now for me and you
’Cuz this relationship should be built on honesty
And we don’t want old stuff to come back and haunt us when we’re a family
Agree?

I sometimes text with my ex-girlfriend just because we’re friends
But if you don’t want me to speak with her, I’ll make sure it ends
I can be sometimes untidy and sometimes I make a mess
But if you ask ’do I look good in this dress?’, I will say ’yes’
I only eat spaghetti, hamburgers and pizza
I have a picture of me leaning against the crooked tower of Pisa
If I do not pluck my eyebrows, they will grow to one
I know the entire lyrics to Celine Dion’s ’My Heart Will Go On’
I squeeze the mayonnaise tube right here in the middle
I forget the toilet seat, and Ringo is my favourite Beatle
I have every episode of ’Teen Mom’ on my PVR
And I collect all of my toenails in this jar
I have a dream to one day become a famous superstar
And there's a homeless man named Greg that is living in my car
Hope that doesn't scare you away from us two becoming one
Cause we'll have a lot of love and this crappy song

(Wow, that’s a lot to process. I didn’t know... there's... there is a Greg in your car? Well, I appreciate the honesty. So...)

I have a diamond jeweled pink iPhone encasement,
Chronic flatulence and a boy in my basement
If I drink, I turn sexist and I can be a prick
But I will try my utmost not to be like that, now suck my dick
I sometimes cry when I watch a super duper touching movie
I punch my cat, and I think that Nickelback is super groovy
I’ve had like fifty girlfriends before we met each other
Let’s say like fifty-one, if we include your mother
I have so many things on my heart that I gotta say
I hate your laughter, and your sex face makes me sort of gay
I know it’s harsh, but honesty that's what I'm all about
I don't eject the USB before I plug it out
Sometimes I swap babies in the hospital just for fun
And right now under here I’m pointing at you with a loaded gun
I hope you still want to be my one
Cause we’ll have a lot of love and this crappy song

(I don't know if I can...)

I am a wizard and my best friend is a goose named Peter
Sometimes I wet the bed, but mainly I am the bed shitter
If I get bored, I pay my twin brother to hang with you
Actually I am him right now, hello, my name is Stu
I have a family of Martians hiding in my attic
My dad’s also my uncle brother, and I am a 1D fanatic
I was a she, but took a sex change just to be with you
I have eleven pairs of crocs and a YOLO tattoo
I sometimes breastfeed sleeping hoboes, then I run away
I stole the Z from ’crazy’ so that we could just say ’cray’
I might look young, but I am 120 years
Cause I sold my soul to Satan and injected myself with baby tears
I hope you wanna be my girl for all eternity
Cut off my hand, together we will rule the galaxy!
If you don't stop me, this song is gonna last forever
Is it ever gonna take off? Let me tell you: NEVER!
I still believe it’s important with this type of conversation
I really hope that isn’t Too Much Information!

— OK, that was a bit too much.
— Oh...
— It's really because my best friend is a duck, and ducks and geese don't really get along. It’s like vampires and werewolves. So, it’s a no go. I’m sorry. I’m just gotta go...

— Hey Peter, guess who's single and ready to hit the town with his favourite goose friend? That's who!

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