The hulk of a man with a beer in his hand looked like a drunk old fool, And I knew that if I hit him right, I could knock him off that stool. But everybody said, \"Watch out -- that's Tiger Man McCool. He's had a whole lot of fights, and he always come out the winner. Yeah, he's a winner.\"
But I'd had myself about five too many, and I walked up tall and proud, I faced his back and I faced the fact that he'd never stooped or bowed. I said, \"Tiger Man, you're a pussycat,\" and a hush fell on the crowd, I said, \"Let's you and me go outside and see who's the winner\"
Well, he gripped the bar with one big hairy hand and he braced against the wall, He slowly looked up from his beer -- my God, that man was tall. He said, \"Boy, I see you're a scrapper, so just before you fall, I'm gonna tell you just a little what a means to be a winner.\"
He said, \"You see these bright white smilin' teeth, you know they ain't my own. Mine rolled away like Chiclets down a street in San Antone. But I left that person cursin', nursin' seven broken bones. And he only broke three of mine, and that make me a winner.\"
He said, \"Behind his grin, I got a steel pin that holds my jaw in place. A trophy of my most successful motorcycle race. And every mornin' when I wake and touch this scar across my face, It reminds me of all I got by bein' a winner.
Now my broken back was the dyin' act of handsome Harry Clay That sticky Cincinnatti night I stole his wife away. But that woman, she gets uglier and meaner every day. But I got her, boy, and that's what makes me a winner.
You gotta speak loud when you challenge me, son, 'cause it's hard for me to hear With this twisted neck and these migraine pains and this cauliflower ear. 'N' if it weren't for this glass eye of mine, I'd shed a happy tear To think of all you'll get by bein' a winner.
I got arthuritic elbows, boy, I got dislocated knees, From pickin' fights with thunderstorms and chargin' into trees. And my nose been broke so often I might lose it if I sneeze. And, son, you say you still wanna be a winner?
My spine is short three vertebrae and my hip is screwed together. My ankles warn me every time there'll be a change in weather. Guess I kicked too many asses, and when the kicks all get together, They sure can slow you down when you're a winner.
My knuckles are so swollen I can hardly make a fist. Who would have thought old Charlie had a blade taped to his wrist? And my blind eye's where he cut me, and my good eye's where he missed. Yeah, you lose a couple of things when you're a winner.
My head is just a bunch of clumps and lumps and bumps and scars From chargin' broken bottles and buttin' crowded bars. And this hernia -- well, it only proves a man can't lift a car. But you're expected to do it all when you're a winner.
Got a steel plate inside my skull, underneath this store-bought hair. My pelvis is aluminum from takin' ladies' dares. And if you had a magnet, son, you could lift me off my chair. I'm a man of steel, but I'm rustin' -- what a winner.
I got a perforated ulcer, I got strictures and incisions. My prostate's barely holdin' up from those all-night collisions. And I'll have to fight two of you because of my double vision. You're lookin' sick, son -- that ain't right for a winner.
Winnin' that last stock-car rce cost me my favorite toes. Winnin' that factory foreman's job, it browned and broke my nose. And these hemorrhoids come from winnin' all them goddamn rodeos. Sometimes it's a pain in the butt to be a winner.
In the war, I got the Purple Heart, that's why my nerves are gone. And I ruined my liver i