I'm sorry, so sorry You're so very horrid My dearest creation I hereby accept all the blame Your ugliness makes me ashamed
My shudders are instant Your design's non-existent Your glare is persistent Like a hungry wolf eyeing a sheep To be brutal, you give me the creeps
If only I had the talent to make you Exactly as in my mind's eye... If I'd any idea of the skill it would take to I'd never have bothered to try
Your bodysuit's baggy But that's not what nags me, It's how all the glue that I used Has turned to yellow crust Disgusting and not unlike pus
And all I could find in the store That my budget afforded was Fur coloured lime green and orange and puce With the texture of old puppet pubes
It wasn't my mission to make such a travesty Ambition and talentlessness brought calamity The fumes from the glue on my fingers are choking me It stings that my hubris has played this cruel joke on me
I dare not reveal you So now I conceal you Forgetting I left you there You'll slowly decline In a box with a sign In red marker saying simply "Beware!"
For you were just practice I'm sure that the next time I'll know better and do it right So please don't attack me In nightmares I'll have about you When I'm sleeping tonight
Yes, now it is time To hide you away To put you behind me And that's where you'll stay There will be no photographs To show to my friends To give them a bellylaugh At just how horrendous you are Let's be honest, O Object of Wrongness, we've gone much too far