WELL HELLO MY NAME IS 'LOCA' AND I'M A SPECIAL PUG I LIVE IN BELFAST IRELAND AND ME FAVORITE THINGS A HUG I LOVE TO EAT ROAST CHICKEN AND MY FRIENDS SAY I'M GOOD FUN BUT THE ONE THING THAT I CANNOT DO IS I CAN'T FECKIN RUN
I'M BOUNCIN FLOUNCIN FALLIN ALL AROUND THE SHOW ROLLING BOWLING I JUST CAN'T GET IT RIGHT SKIPPING HOPPING TRIPPING UP AND FLOPPING I JUST CAN'T GET THE HANG OF IT THOUGH TRYING AS I MIGHT
I'VE GOT A BROTHER ALFIE A LITTLE PUG LIKE ME ME MUM SAYS HE'S A LAP DOG AS HE'S NEVER OFF HER KNEE HE RUNS JUST LIKE A BULLET THAT'S BEEN FIRED FROM A GUN AND HE'S TRIED HIS BEST TO TEACH ME BUT I STILL CAN'T FECKIN RUN
I'M BOUNCIN FLOUNCIN FALLING ALL AROUND THE SHOW ROLLING BOWLING AT RUNNING I'M A FLOP I'VE TRIED ME BEST I NEVER REST TO RUN A MILE'S ME FINAL QUEST BUT ONCE I DO GET GOING THEN I CANNOT FECKIN STOP
I'VE ANOTHER SISTER LUCY A LAID BACK DOG IS SHE I LUV TO CUDDLE UP TO HER AND SHE CUDDLES UP TO ME SHE'S PRETTY GOOD AT RUNNING AND SHE'D SURE DO YOU NO HARM UNLESS YOU TRY TO TAKE HER STICK THEN SHE'LL RIP OFF YOUR ARM
I'M BOUNCIN FLOUNCIN FALLING ALL AROUND THE SHOW ROLLING BOWLING AT RUNNING I'M A DUD IT' SEEMS UNFAIR IT MUST BE RARE AND IN TRUTH I REALLY WOULDN'T CARE BUT THE OTHERS KEEP ON RUNNING WHILE I'M STUCK HERE IN THE MUD
NOW ME FINAL SISTER'S LAYLA A PEDIGREE IS SHE SHE WON A PUPPY TRAINING PRIZE IN TWENTY ZERO THREE BUT SHE CAN RUN LIKE BILLIO FLIES UP AND DOWN THE HILL IF I TRIED THAT I'D FALL QUITE FLAT MESELF I'D SURELY KILL
SO I'M BOUNCIN FLOUNCIN FALLIN ALL AROUND THE SHOW ROLLING BOWLING I THINK I'LL JUST GIVE UP IT'S NOT FOR ME ITS PLAIN TO SEE A RUNNER I WILL NEVER BE SO I THINK I'LL JUST ACCEPT ME LOT AND BE A WALKING PUP
THERE'S A MORAL TO THIS STORY FOR HAPPY STILL AM I JUST BECAUSE I CANNOT RUN NO REASON FOR TO CRY I LUV ME LIFE I LUV ME HOUSE AND I LUV ME FAMILY AND THE THING THAT MAKES IT ALL OK MY FAMILY LUVS ME