Now here's a little story To tell it is a must About an unsung hero That moves away your dust Some people make a fortune Other's earn a mint My old man don't earn much In fact....he's flippin'.....skint
Oh, my old man's a dustman He wears a dustman's hat He wears cor blimey trousers And he lives in a council flat He looks a proper narner In his great big hob nailed boots He's got such a job to pull em up That he calls them daisy roots
Some folks give tips at Christmas And some of them forget So when he picks their bins up He spills some on the steps Now one old man got nasty And to the council wrote Next time my old man went 'round there He punched him up the throat
Oh, my old man's a dustman He wears a dustman's hat He wears cor blimey trousers And he lives in a council flat
I say, I say Duncan I 'er...I found a police dog in my dustbin (How do you know he's a police dog) He had a policeman with him
Though my old man's a dustman He's got a heart of gold He got married recently Though he's 86 years old We said 'Ear! Hang on Dad you're getting past your prime' He said 'Well when you get to my age' 'It helps to pass the time'
Oh, my old man's a dustman He wears a dustman's hat He wears cor blimey trousers And he lives in a council flat
I say, I say, I say My dustbins full of lillies (Well throw 'em away then) I can't Lilly's wearing them
Now one day while in a hurry He missed a lady's bin He hadn't gone but a few yards When she chased after him 'What game do you think you're playing' She cried right from the heart 'You've missed me...am I too late' 'No... jump up on the cart'
Oh, my old man's a dustman He wears a dustman's hat He wears cor blimey trousers And he lives in a council flat
I say, I say, I say (What you again) My dustbin's absolutely full with toadstools (How do you know it's full) 'Cos there's not much room inside
He found a tiger's head one day Nailed to a piece of wood The tiger looked quite miserable But I suppose it should Just then from out a window A voice began to wail He said (Oi! Where's me tiger head) Four foot from it's tail
Oh, my old man's a dustman He wears a dustman's hat He wears cor blimey trousers And he lives in a council flat Next time you see a dustman Looking all pale and sad Don't kick him in the dustbin It might be my old dad