Reaching for the inner bright, the very essence-sun of my dreaming bliss Guided by a fear blinded outside all shades of the perfect black
The scattered jigsaw of my redemption laid out before my eyes Each piece as amorphous as the other Each piece in its lack of shape a lie
Me the paragon of fear, an immobile skein of tangled nerves exposed Hastily clawing my way into the darkest of my inner scenes of torture
I stay my breath to escape this slavery I stay my breath to re-awake and face it encore The struggle to free myself of restraints, becomes my very shackles
Non-physical smothering. Asphyxiation by oxygen hands Drowning in the endless sky. An ever-downward dive, only to surface the sewage of indecision, on which all sense of self is afloat The vortex-acceleration a constant. Resolute in purpose its choking flow
My ignorance cast in the mold of all things absolute I sustain forever my gaze. A stare fixed on the distant oblivion Resting in the inverted state of being dead, non-sensory matter As all the earth, the wind, the fire, the sea behold and learn to pity me
Mutiny of self. Insurrection games convincingly performed Incapacitated by physical thoughts acting out the will of tendon and bone Have the bridges of insanity been crossed and forever retracted? Am I standing among a thousand selves? Is the multitude of laughters mine alone?
The feeding frenzy of my starving soul, gnawing voraciously at the bones, the exo-skeletal patchwork protecting my own reflection within; The twin-and-same engaged in the mirrored act of chewing away at the shell of my attacking self. The paradox unseen
Treacherous this deceit to make no choice matter To have and yet lose yourself, until finally all reasons why are forgotten To live through ones own shadow. Mute and blinded, is to really see Eclipse the golden mirror and the reflection is set free
So imminently visible – this cloaked innocent guilt Sentenced to a lifetime, a second of structured chaos Trampled by the ferocious, raging crowds of solitude I'm the soil beneath me soaking up the sustenance of my own death
Extradited to the gods of chance, the deities of all things random Alive, multicolored, twitching in their dead monochrome world
Iridescent to the searhing eyes, I m all things vivid in a world of grey So easily spotted, so easily claimed in this domain where all is prey
My thoughts a radiant beacon to the omnidirectional hunter-god radar I m a markerlight of flesh to these subconscious carnivores I am them. I am teeth. I m their arousal at the kill Feasting on self. A schizoreality warp. The contradiction fulfilled
Focus the only means to see me back to life s unending swirl
A reversal of passing away, as the world of dead, as away is now my origin
I float through physical thoughts. I stare down the abyss of organic dreams All bets off, I plunge – Only to find that self is shed
A lie to maintain equilibrium, to hold me in this dead realm this last ever dream I m the thought that never crossed my mind disguised in the evident. Forever unredeemed
A new level reached, where the absence of air lets me breathe I'm inverted electrical impulses. A malfunctioning death-code incomplete All things before me, at first unliving glimpse undeciphered
Its semantics rid of logic. Nothing is all. All is contradiction
Grinding, churning the sweetest ever noises Decode me into their non-communication A soundtrack to my failure, one syllable, one vowel
A stagnant flow of endings. Un-time unbound. Merging to form the multi-none A sickly dance of matter, malignantly benign. Greeting the chasm unbearable, sublime
Vision will blind. Severance ties. Median am I. True are all lies