The road to the top, through crossguards and hard knocks Copper penny times and endless city blocks Thieves straight as they never been crooked rent-a-cops Shooting craps in the back of vacant city lots Free-range circus acts and worthless facts Dancing in my solar soggy bowl of Diggum' smacks Fist-fucking faggots at the White on gymmats Rats run the wire while I'm looking for a match I go back and forth just like a cameo song Honeys wanna love me but the line is too long I make 'em take a number Wake 'em from their slumber What you know about Mickey? (He's a bad motherfucker) Truckers get my digits off the stalls of rest stops I'm sick on the microphone like smallpox Wild-eyed babies go crazy when I rock Blind old ladies into diabetic shock
It's all the same when they call my name Mickey Avalon, hustler hall of fame There ain't no ball and chain, to hold me down Got a golden smile and a platinum frown It's all the same when they call my name Mickey Avalon, hustler hall of fame There ain't no ball and chain, to hold me down Got a golden smile and a platinum frown
I flow like Niagara, go tell your manager That Mickey Avalon ain't no motherfuckin' amateur I fly flicks with my dick at your camera I rip the stick out my girl's Porsche Carrera I brought your whole formula, just warmin' up Storm the frontline and then I find a spot for lunch Toxic-proof punch when the loot comes Rocket boosters with my boots on Underneath the tundra reach out for the Thundercats Holds no better than this brother act I ripped the rubber mats out your lover's pad And kicked your mother's ass right in front of your dad Last night, a brass pipe and a flashlight Smashed my crown and left me down with a black eye The bad guy, walking over landmines, who can't die but still cried
And it's all the same when they call my name Mickey Avalon, hustler hall of fame There ain't no ball and chain, to hold me down Got a golden smile and a platinum frown It's all the same when they call my name Mickey Avalon, hustler hall of fame There ain't no ball and chain, to hold me down Got a golden smile and a platinum frown
Leave your gods and your politics back at home Cause I just wanna drink and be left alone I gotta girl who likes to talk my ear off, see So when I'm at the bar stay away from me Don't ask for a smoke or to make some change I don't care about your kid or your menstrual pains You can call me rude but I like my solitude And we don't need to chat while we're playing pool So stay cool mister, I wasn't lookin' at your sister That snaggletoothed sea hag, lips all blistered Now rack the balls while I'm in the stall Pissin' out vodka and walkin' up the walls I turn off the ringer when my lady calls Don't point your finger unless you want a brawl I chalk up my cue and sink the eight ball Then reach into my pocket and light a Pall Mall
Cause it's all the same when they call my name Mickey Avalon, hustler hall of fame There ain't no ball and chain, to hold me down Got a golden smile and a platinum frown It's all the same when they call my name Mickey Avalon, hustler hall of fame There ain't no ball and chain, to hold me down Got a golden smile and a platinum frown