Last thought before sleep in silence I forced out words maybe there could have been a better time it's not impression I feel less than blessed but I'm no less sick of being afraid and not to love for the sake of words you never meant I'm sure it only means I'm still the coward you've known I'm still scared I'm so sick of keeping this in I'm so sick of believing I'm less than you've asked for and it never seems to fill this hole aversion to reflection and swear it will be the last time every time precious not in growing only in knowing that I've fallen short every time
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