Mike Campbell - Iditarod | Текст песни

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• Mike Campbell
• Iditarod

There's a race across the frozen snow and its run from Anchorage into Nome,
Across a land that was built by God, it's a race they call Iditarod,
I've run that race myself three times, when I'd lose I'd start to crying,
Figured I'd never race again until I found me a way to win.
Iditarod, Iditarod, OOOOO Iditarod.

So I got me a mail order PhD in bio-medical-genealogy,
I needed dogs that were fast and mean so I started into splicing genes.
I got chromosomes from a thoroughbred mare, pitbull, cheetah and a grizzly bear,
Added some wolverine and gazelle, a little bit of road runner, "What the hell!".
Iditarod, Iditarod, OOOOO Iditarod.

I spliced them all to some Husky genes, there was just enough to make me a team,
I crossed my fingers and I made a wish, and tossed each one in a Petrie dish.
Well three months later them pups were born they had spotted hair, hooves and horns,
They were big and mean and awful strong and each one thought I was his mom.
Iditarod, Iditarod, OOOOO Iditarod.

Well finally race day came around and I brought my team into Anchor town.
We went running off down the street with a growl and a whinny and a "beep, beep".
Out of Wasilla, into Knik, running so fast it was making me sick,
Through Yentna, Skwentna, mountains high, we were third into Nikolai.
Iditarod, Iditarod, OOOOO Iditarod.

We rested for twenty-four in McGrath, out of Ophir moving fast,
Underneath the sky so blue, out of Kaltag number two,
Against the wind across ice so thick, first place into Shaktoolik,
But while we were running along, I could tell there was something going wrong.
Iditarod, Iditarod, OOOOO Iditarod.

So I set up my electron microscope, gave one of my dogs a needle poke,
Put some blood into that machine, but then I couldn't believe what I was seeing,
The gazelle genes were starting to shake, the bear genes wanted to hibernate,
The thoroughbred genes still wanted to run, but each of them wolverine genes were done.
Iditarod, Iditarod, OOOOO Iditarod.

They were flopping around like a bunch of bats, their insides fighting like dogs and cats,
Facial ticks and burps and farts, their double helix was falling apart.
At Safety, they gave a mighty roar, broke their lines and away they tore,
Out across the tundra gray, in each of sixteen different ways.
Iditarod, Iditarod, OOOOO Iditarod.

Now I pulled that sled all on my own,
I was sixty-third under the arch in Nome,
And not one single dog was left,
Of the team I thought would win that test.

But I know that they are out there still, they'd be too difficult to kill,
You'd need fourteen tags and permits too, like getting permission to shoot a zoo.
So if you ever run into my hybrid beasts, take a photograph at least,
Give them my best as they run by, and let them know that their mom says, "Hi".
Iditarod, Iditarod, OOOOO Iditarod.
Iditarod, Iditarod, OOOOO Iditarod.

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