I thought in the end I had found a home, but it was all just an illusion. I thought this was where I would not be alone, instead it plunged me deep into confusion.
I thought there was always something to condone. but in the end I saw it would not work out. I considered those gloomy times to be gone, but now they were back, so beyond a doubt.
I can feel all the barriers torn down, and all my thoughts, they feel so light and free. all the baggage that died with my last frown, to make way for a second reality.
I can feel so much that has gone away, with that darkness no more a part of me. all the things I thought forced me to stay, now forgotten with a past reality.
I can feel it die away without sound, like a fading image of a past me, with no place in the freedom I have found, living in this second reality.
but I need to leave my place below deck, so long have I felt it is long past twelve. when I need to turn and never look back, to go where I can just be myself.
I know somewhere I skidded off the track, but I just could not see clearly back then. I need to leave behind all that slack, and find out once more who I really am.