I'd like to thank everyone I have ever slept with This award I've won Is really yours You helped with my career Eight or nine a year To me you're the real rising British stars
I'd like to thank my seducers And also my seduced My producers And the whole supporting cast My principal photographer That unprincipled pornographer Without whom the whole thing would be lost
I'd like to thank everyone I have ever slept with It really was Cecil B De Mille The billions of sperm The babies unborn You applied so much spermicide to kill
I'd like to thank everyone I have ever slept with Some of you are squirming out there Hoping and praying I won't reveal your names Don't worry, we all know who you are
So thank you Sallie Popplewell And Rosemary Barber Klee Hitchens And Annalise Sinclair Natasha Kefalonis Angelika Adonis Tracey Emin And 37 more
I'd like to thank everyone I have ever slept with Thank you from the bottom of my heart And from the heart of my bottom I know it must be rotten To provide the raw material for art
I'd like to thank everyone I have ever slept with The casting directors and the fans There's a tent in my brain Where I've embroidered all your names I love you And 'je ne regrette rien'
I'd like to thank everyone I have ever slept with Like an elephant, I never forgot My make-up artist Pierre My landscape gardener My mother, my manager and God