Middle class is magical A safe world free from strife Let bad things happen to other folk While you read Country Life Buy an AGA, wear a Monsoon dress Get your food from M&S Own an iPhone, watch Bear Grylls Take antidepressant pills
Middle class is magical Drive a 4x4 to school! Keep three sorts of hummus in your fridge Make-over your downstairs loo Learn to salsa, ski in Verbier Drink too much Chilean Chardonnay Ignore the homeless, don't mind burkas Condescend to migrant workers
When all the world is middle class There'll be no poverty or starvation 'Cos we'll all grow our own mangetout And Myleene Klass will rule the nation! Because...
Middle class is magical Join us and you'll see You're already halfway there 'Cos you're not watching ITV! Yes, middle class is magical What matters is what we wear Let's pay someone else to do the difficult jobs While we work on our hair