So early in the day and i'm already tired, but hey, good morning. The weather seems too fine, it's annoying. Here's to the sun: would you mind going into the shadows for a bit? It's too bright, i can't even open my eyes. I don't wanna see anything. Don't wanna think anything. Might as well quit being a human and turn into moss. Back then, when it was nice and great, everything was too romanticized, it messed with my mind. I have no idea whether something actually happened or if i just made all that up, la-la-lah. And i can't try to remember since it's to early in the morning, my brain's not working. Gradually, steadily attempting suicide over and over again until i can die in peace. No matter how many times i try to bite off my own tongue, it'd just grow back the following evening. Slowly, carefully, hurting myself, letting it rot like with a dish of double-cooked pork. It terms of quality, i'd surely receive the consolation prize. All rigth i've managed to bite off my tongue now. Surviving for as long as i can survive, putting aside the matter of whether that's a blessing or a curse, as long as i can enjoy it while i still can, that's already an awesome deal. The festivity has also long been over, but my remaining years don't seem all that terrible. If i were to look at it rather optimistically, i should still have a couple decades, i should still have a couple decades, a couple decades more to live. Happy birthday. Time for celebration. There's a whole feast waiting. Indeed, someone sure seems to be in a good mood, even though everything's a complete waste of effort. I've blown out the candles, and they've gone out without a sound. It's not over yet, but i'm filled with this emptiness, as if it's already all over. Gradually, steadily, it's the lost round in the game, just one step away from finishing. Discarding who knows how many dora tiles, claiming the discarded ones if one doesn't mind not winning big. Slowly, carefully, build up to a furiten, then get a huge penalty. If you can laugh it off, just laugh it off. Come on, it's renchan. Make it quick. Surviving for as long as i can survive, putting aside the matter of whether that's a blessing or a curse, as long as i can enjoy it while i still can, that's already an awesome deal. The festivity has also long been over, but my remaining years don't seem all that terrible. If i were to look at it rather optimistically, i should still have a couple decades more to live. Surviving for as long as i can survive, allowing myself to cry when i feel like crying, and so long as eventually, there'd randomly come the day i can laugh, then that's already an awesome deal. The festivity has also long been over, but there are still some sparklers left. Come on, let's light these up and watch those feeble glows. There are still a couple decades, a couple decades, a couple decades more to live.