I am tall and I am thin Of an enviable hight And I've been known to be quite handsome In a certain angle and in certain light
Well I entered into O'Malley's Said, 'O'Malley, I have a thirst' O'Malley merely smiled at me, Said, 'You wouldn't be the first'
I knocked on the bar and pointed To a bottle on the shelf And as O'Malley poured me out a drink I sniffed and crossed myself
My hand decided that the time was nigh And for a moment it slipped from view And when it returned, it fairly burned With confidence anew
Well the thunder from my steely fist Made all the glasses jangle When I shot him, I was so handsome It was the light, it was the angle
'Neighbours!' I cried, 'Friends!' I screamed, I banged my fist upon the bar, 'I bear no grudge against you! And my dick felt long and hard!'
'I am the man for which no God waits But for which the whole world yearns I'm marked by darkness and by blood And one thousand powder-burns'
Well, you know those fish with the swollen lips That clean the ocean floor When I looked at poor old O'Malley's wife That's exactly what I saw
I jammed the barrel under her chin And her face looked raw and vicious Her head it landed in the sink With all the dirty dishes
Her little daughter Siobhan Pulled beers from dusk till down And amongst the townfolk she was a bit of a joke But she pulled the best beer in town
I swooped magnificent upon her As she sat shivering in her grief Like the Madonna painted on the church-house wall In whale's blood and banana leaf
Her throat it crumbled in my fist And I spun heroically around To see Caffrey rising from his seat I shot that mother fucker down
'I have no free will', I sang As I flew about the murder Mrs. Richard Holmes, she screamed You really should have heard her
I sang and I laughed, I howled and I wept I panted like a pup I blew a hole in Mrs. Richard Holmes And her husband stupidly stood up
As he screamed, 'You are an evil man' And I paused a while to wonder 'If I have no free will then how can I Be morally culpable, I wonder'
I shot Richard Holmes in the stomach And gingerly he sat down And he whispered weirdly, 'No offense' And then lay upon the ground
'None taken', I replied to him To which he gave a little cough With blazing wings I neatly aimed And blew his head completely off
I've lived in this town for thirty years And to no-one I am a stranger And I put new bullets in my gun Chamber upon chamber
And I turned my gun on the bird-like Mr. Brookes I thought of Saint Francis and his sparrows And as I shot down the youthful Richardson It was St. Sebastian I thought of, and his arrows
I said, 'I want to introduce myself And I am glad that all you came' And I leapt upon the bar And shouted out my name
Well Jerry Bellows, he hugged his stool Closed his eyes and shrugged and laughed And with an ashtray as big as a fucking really big brick I split his head in half
His blood spilled across the bar Like a steaming scarlet brook And I knelt at it's edge on the counter Wiped the tears away and looked
Well, the light in there was blinding Full of God and ghosts of truth I smiled at Henry Davenport Who made an attempt to move
Well, from the position I was standing The strangest thing I ever saw The bullet entered through the top of his chest And blew his bowels out on the floor
Well I floated down the counter Showing no remorse I shot a hole in Kathleen Carpenter Recently divorced