all my enemies are formed by attempts just to be ok I have many and it's scary it's scary to recognize them and to realize they're not on my side and it smells like fall smells like fall but it's winter it smells like fall smells like fall when it rains restless ran me from my home restless joined me again on the road and we skipped down the alleyways and under the bridges highways from ocean to ocean and further trestles cross rivers and ripe berry brambles and we lay in the pines and it tasted like salt and the rust metal gritting of teeth in a lie and it smelled like death my old town stands on pain my ghosts they lurk so cruel oh you know me my old secrets too and it smells of old hurt oh you wrap your icy arms round me in the sickening humidity of this mattress and we're off once again cause the past is so frightening we're sure if we stopped for a month it would find us and I'm always angry and we can't stop fighting and we slept on a train and it tasted like smoke and the filthy sweet tingle of wanting to cry and I smell my own fear