I know what my people are thinking tonight As home through the shadows they wander Ev'ryone smiling in secret delight They stare at the castle and ponder Whenever the wind blows this way You can almost hear ev'ryone say
I wonder what the King is doing tonight What merriment is the King pursuing tonight The candles at the court, they never burn'd as bright I wonder what the King is up to tonight How goes the final hour, as he sees the bridal bower Being legally and regally prepared Well, I'll tell you what the King is doing tonight He's scared! He's scared!
You mean that a King who fought a dragon Whack'd him in two and fix'd his wagon Goes to be wed in terror and distress? Yes! A warrior who's so calm in battle Even his armor doesn't rattle Faces a woman petrified with fright? Right! You mean that appalling clamoring That sounds like a blacksmith hammering Is merely the banging of his royal knees? Please!
You wonder what the King is wishing tonight He's wishing he were in Scotland fishing tonight What occupies his time while waiting for the bride? He's searching high and low for some place to hide And oh, the expectation, the sublime anticipation He must feel about the wedding night to come!
Well, I'll tell you what the King is feeling tonight He's numb! He shakes! He quails! He quakes! Oh, that's what the King is doing.. tonight!