I am Adolfo Pirelli Da king of da barbers Da barber of kings E Buon Giorno, good day I blow you a kiss
And I, da so famous Pirelli I wish-a to know-a Who has-a the nerve-a to say My elixir is piss! Who says this?
TODD (spoken) I do. I’m Mr. Sweeney Todd from Fleet Street. I have opened a bottle of Pirelli’s Elixir And I say to you, it is nothing But an arrant fraud, Concocted from piss and ink. Furthermore, Signor, I have serviced no kings, Yet I wager that I can shave a cheek With ten times more dexterity Than any street mountebank.
PIRELLI (spoken) You hear dis foolish man? Now please you will see How he will regret his folly!
TODD (spoken) Who’s for a free shave? Will Beadle Bamford be the judge?
BAMFORD (spoken) Glad, as always to oblige, My friends and neighbours! The fastest, smoothest shave, is the winner!
PIRELLI (sung) Now signorini, signori We mix-a da lather But first-a you gather
Around signorini, signori You looking a man Who had-a da glory To shave-a da pope
Misterr Sweeney, whoever I beg-a da pardon You’ll probably say-a It was only a cardinal Nope! It was-a da pope!
To shave-a da face To cut-a da hair Require a grace Require da flare
For if-a you slip You nick da skin You clip-a da chin You rip-a da lip A bit beyond-a repair
To shave-a da face Or even a part Widout it-a smart Require da heart
Not just-a da flash It take-a Panash It take-a da passion for da art
To shave-a da face To trim-a da beard To make-a da bristle Clean like a whistle Dis is from early infancy Da talent give to me by God
It take-a da skill It take-a da brains It take-a da will To take-a da pains It take-a da pace It take-a da grace…