TIGER, IMITATING KRUPKE Yeah you, gimme one good reason for not draggin' ya down the station house, ya punk!
RIFF Dear kindly Sergeant Krupke You gotta understand It's just our bringin' upke That gets us out of hand Our mothers all are junkies Our fathers all are drunks Golly Moses, naturally we're punks
JETS Gee, Officer Krupke We're very upset We never had the love That every child oughta get We ain't no delinquents We're misunderstood Deep down inside us there is good
RIFF There is good!
JETS There is good, there is good There is untapped good Like inside, the worst of us is good
TIGER, IMITATING KRUPKE That's a touching good story
RIFF Lemme tell it to the world!
TIGER, IMITATING KRUPKE Just tell it to the judge
RIFF Dear kindly Judge, your Honor My parents treat me rough With all their marijuana They won't give me a puff They didn't wanna have me But somehow I was had Leapin' lizards, that's why I'm so bad
SNOWBOY IMITATING JUDGE Right! Officer Krupke You're really a square This boy don't need a judge He needs an analyst's care It's just his neurosis That oughta be curbed He's psychologically disturbed
RIFF I'm disturbed
JETS We're disturbed, we're disturbed We're the most disturbed Like we're psychologically disturbed
SNOWBOY IMITATING JUDGE Hear ye, hear ye. In the opinion of this court, this child is depraved on account he ain't had a normal home.
RIFF Hey, I'm depraved on account I'm deprived!
SNOWBOY IMITATING JUDGE So take him to a headshrinker. You! [ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/w/westside_story/gee_officer_krupke.html ] ACTION Who me?
RIFF My daddy beats my mommy My mommy clobbers me My grandpa is a commie My grandma pushes tea My sisters wears a moustache My brother wears a dress Goodness gracious, that's why I'm a mess
ACTION IMITATING HEADSHRINKER Yes, Officer Krupke He shouldn't be here This boy don't need a couch He needs a usefully career Society's played him a terrible trick And sociologically he's sick
RIFF I am sick!
JETS We are sick, we are sick We are sick sick sick Like we're sociologically sick
ACTION IMITATING HEADSHRINKER In my opinion, this child does not need to have his head shrunk at all. Juvenile delinquency is purely a social disease.
RIFF Hey, I got a social disease!
ACTION IMITATING HEADSHRINKER So take him to a social worker
RIFF Dear kindly social worker They tell me get a job Like be a soda jerker Which means I'd be a slob It's not I'm antisocial I'm only anti-work Glory Osky, that's why I'm a jerk
A-RAB Eek, Officer Krupke You've done it again This boy don't need a job He needs a year in the pen It ain't just a question of misunderstood Deep down inside he's no good
RIFF I'm no good
JETS We're no good, we're no good We're no earthly good Like the best of us is no damn good
The trouble is he's lazy The trouble is he drinks The trouble is he's crazy The trouble is he stinks The trouble is he's growing The trouble is he's grown Krupke, we've got troubles of our own
Officer Krupke We're down on our knees
RIFF 'Cause no one wants a fella With a social disease