Baljeet: Good King Wenceslas looked out On the feast of Stephen...
Buford: Sorry I'm late. I was busy doin' some rewrites. Baljeet: Rewrites? Buford: I've highlighted your parts. Now sing along.
Buford: Santa Claus and all his elves Are making gifts for Buford Baljeet: I don't think that's how it goes Buford: Nobody's askin' you, nerd
Baljeet: Buford! You're completely disrespecting this classic song. You're ignoring the historical context. King Wenceslas was a great man. You have no idea what this song is about! Buford: I know all about this song.
Buford: The words were by an English guy The music, Scandinavian Wenceslas was five-foot-six He kept his face unshaven Though just a duke throughout his life He always ruled so justly His kingly title was conferred Upon him posthumously
Baljeet: Well, I stand corrected. You seem to have a lot of information. But if you know so much about it, why do you not sing the original song? Buford: I like my version better. It's about me!
Buford: Buford should get lots of gifts Every Christmas season When I see presents just for me It always is so pleasin' That is why I changed the words To make the song more edgy If you don't like the way I sing You'll get a Christmas wedgie Baljeet: Oh, it's lovely. You're a veritable Oscar Hammerstein the Second, or uh...oh, well, at least it's over!
Note: Lines in blue are in the Album version only.