[Verse 1: Professor Green] I want me a Vegas girl I don't like the song but I'd love me a Vegas girl How do I have the audacity to say this? I'm a little bit of a sadist, girl I say this, I say that Whatever I say, I never take back I've got no respect Ask Dream Mclean and his enormous head I ain't got the heart to care Ask him how long he spends in the barbers' chair I wouldn't wanna be your barber Picture me on a sheep in a barber I'm Green like a frog and I ribbet No, I've not lost it, I'm just being silly Really need an ump and I'm going on millie I don't mean I'm going on Millie How much longer could he go? My mind can only be described as unhealthy No, I wasn't made in Chelsea I'm just living it up real tosh
[Hook: James Craise] I wear them dead man's shoes I wear them dead man's shoes I wear them dead man's shoes I wear them dead man's shoes
[Verse 2: Professor Green] I've had an idea, who knows how We can raise the national IQ? I do Take every member of every reality TV show For a little trip on a ship and then sink the boat Thank God Millie quit the show, I'm unbiased It's simple, Millie would've been on the ship too A prick to anybody and everybody There ain't a woman alive that I wouldn't be a dick to But you came into my life And now everything's so sweet I found my perfect match in a woman Who gives more hugs than me, Millie Me and my bird are barmy Two peas in a pod, edamame Couldn't care less what the whole world thinks of me As long as the in-laws think I'm charming, darling
[Hook: James Craise]
[Verse 3: Professor Green] In a couple of years, I'll be speaking posh "He ain't hood anymore, he's a tot" Picture hearing me speaking in a posh accent Like "come hither now, clean my cock"? "What did you say, young man?" "Is this the way young people behave nowadays, young man?" That was when she hit me with her walking stick and said "That ought to teach you for talking shit" I don't even know who she was, this is what the weed does Millie, I'm gonna be with you forever Only till the day that we divorce and I get taken to the cleaners Probably for getting caught fondling the clean-er It's never gonna happen! She's 68! She has had four children! It would be like throwing a hotdog down a hallway!
[Hook: James Craise]
[Outro: Professor Green] I wear them, I wear them Them dead man's shoes, I wear them I wear them, I wear them Them dead man's shoes, I wear them Dead man's shoes, I wear them Dead man's shoes, I wear them I wear them, I wear them Them dead man's shoes, I wear them